lost in my reality

Errand#1

2012-02-02T09:37:00.001+08:00

Running mode.

So sleepy and hungry.

Somehow, not having any work available makes me more likely to eat.

Can someone please bring me food? T_T

random thought of the day

2012-02-02T00:40:00.003+08:00

i can't promise this will work out but i think u'll have a better chance at happiness with me & we can work it out from there

weather forecast

2012-02-02T00:27:00.001+08:00

Will it rain or will it shine?

the opposite version of someone

2012-02-02T00:25:00.001+08:00

I was with the family in Klang for breakfast. Somehow, something told me that boo was nearby. It was one of those random thoughts that come up. Quite like how random my memory suddenly pops up that dinner. Or while in the middle of a conversation with my mother, my mind drifted of to the time we were in Penang.

The scenes were so vivid and alive in my mind that it was as though it only happened the week ago. If not yesterday. No, I wasn't high. Wish I was but my source refused to bring the goods to me and asked me to go over to his place instead. Two guys and a girl in an apartment, I don't know, something's not right with that math, if you get what I mean.

Does it still pain me so, those flashes of memories?
Not as much. Not anymore. I now look back at them wistfully and just sigh. Not a sigh of relief. Just a sigh of "those were the good days". That's reminiscing?

Anyway, I don't pay heed to much of them anymore these days. They seem to be happening more frequently. Wonder why. Hmm..

As my eyes scanned through the restaurant, this man caught my attention. At a glance, he looked like boo. The thin version of him. Blinked a few times and sighed a relief that it wasn't.

If I was hoping to bump into him there, why was I relieved to know it wasn't him?
Because bumping into him there could potentially spell disaster. Family dramas. No good. NG.
Who knows, perhaps I would bump into him one fine day.

Like in the next lifetime.

Review: Klang Palace, Centro

2012-02-02T00:12:00.000+08:00

Here again. We are always here on Sunday mornings.If you ever want to stalk me, try to go there and chances are you just may bump into me there. Thus, same logic, don't ever go there if you don't ever want to cross paths with me.

My sister and I truly agree that the check-in function in fb is meant to allow people to stalk you. Though, can you check into another location than the one you are physically in?Ok, so I tested it out. I can actually check in to another location but fb also shows my location -_- Maybe it's because of the location setting is enabled on my phone. Dang.

Steamed layered salted egg yolk bun. A rather old school dish, it's my new likeable dish. Or a dish that I like. Salty and sweet at the same time. Hot and fluffy and airy on the inside.

Roasted chicken. Not sure why they ordered this apart from the fact that it was still CNY. But, I'm glad they did because the chicken was so smooth and had enough flavours in it. Not too strong but enough to mask the chicken meaty taste. It also had a garlic oil sauce which I didn't find make much different but mom especially liked it.

Porridge but with fatt choy and oyster. I've always liked their porridge because it's smooth and light but filling. This is, of course, no exception but did taste slightly fishy from the oyster.

Deep fried shisamo with sweet sauce. It wasn't crispy enough and the sweet sauce drizzled on it made it even somewhat wet. Still prefer the Japanese version.

Review: Pantai Seafood, Kayu Ara

2012-02-01T23:26:00.000+08:00

The winter solstice dinner with the family here. The whole works basically.

Went home earlier that day as I was feeling tired at work, risking the bad traffic from home to here although it's like really near. Turned out that I wasn't the last one to arrive. Tee hee.

Parents made tang yuen with my other cousin, jien and they brought it to the dinner. Green from pandan, red from some other natural ingredient. They are planting different types of spices and herbs in the garden in an attempt to an organic lifestyle. I don't think they'd go to the extent of organic fertilizing.

The Yee sisters. We don't look alike at all.
My hair was looking ultra sleek that day. No, I didn't shower at all before heading out for dinner. Aiyo, it's not like I do hard labour in the office that I'd be stinking at the end of the day. But now, not so sure anymore since I have to walk to the other end of the world to get my car. fml.

Chopped garlic. Wasabi for our first dish as you'll see.

Sliced geoduck. Well, it's not like you can eat it if it's not sliced. Not only would it be near impossible, it would probably look very obscene should you even attempt to, given its interesting shape.

I've tried it before and quite liked it. Not because it's aphrodisiac (quite a waste since it's going to be a dry ~~season~~ year) but the crunchy and slightly rubbery texture.
Although you can opt to have it raw as sashimi, this just wasn't fresh enough for it as it tasted a little too fishy even with the soy sauce and wasabi.

So we cooked it all in the pot of herbal soup.

The restaurant was packed that night and we had a difficult time placing our orders. Somehow we didn't order enough but it's ok. Need to keep fit too.

Sizzling tofu in mushroom gravy with minced pork. A simple homely dish but very appetising.

Tri layer pork stir fried with dried chilli. Nope, it's not that spicy. It's a Chinese dish la. Not that we can't cook something that'll burn your tongue (think: Szechuan cuisine). Being Cantonese/Teochew and having brought up in that manner, we all don't particularly fancy too much of (chilli) heat in our food.
And this was good too. The meat had the right ratio of fat and lean meat, cooked until just right, still soft but has a bit of texture to it.

Stir fried veggie. Not my choice . I don't really like to eat the full grown version of this. Don't know what it's called. Hello, what's the point of knowing something I don't like?

I think my father likes this . A lot. I do too if not for the the fact that half the time they overbake it . But flavours wise, top notch. Garlic and cheese, who'd thought they marry off and live happily ever after. Like sweet and sour.

Why another veggie dish, beats me. Another species of greens that isn't in my eat list. Love the gravy courtesy of the mushroom but that's about it.

Steamed fish nyonya style. A very appetizing dish as it was slightly sourish and the fish was rather fresh.

As we were still a little hungry (there were 9 adults), we ordered the longevity noodles as well. It wasn't dry enough but still pass la. Lots of meat and shrimp too.

Given how packed the place was the night, they surprisingly delivered pretty good food all around..

hey you

2012-02-01T20:29:00.001+08:00

Yeah , you.

I'm bored and kinda free tomorrow. Want to go grab some lunch?

~
Sometimes I wonder if I should pretend that I don't know that you know.
Feign ignorance when we meet, when we talk.

How long can this game of charade go on?

run, baby, run

2012-02-01T19:10:00.003+08:00

Found this while reading 9gag.
When I showed it to win, he literally went and warned me not to show it to his heavily pregnant wife as he would need to deal with the consequences later.

It was a good fright.

wow wee

2012-02-01T18:59:00.001+08:00

Tues 8pm: Yay, I'm going for a manicure tomorrow. Must remember to print out the voucher.

Tues 11pm: Yay, I'm going for a manicure tomorrow. Must remember to print out the voucher in the office.

Wed 6.30am: Yay, I'm going for a manicure today. Must remember to print out the voucher later.

Wed 10am: Yay, I'm going for a manicure today. Better finish my work up ASAP and leave on the dot at 4pm to make it to my 5pm appointment. Must remember to print out the voucher.

Wed 4pm: Yay, finally finished for today. I'm going for a manicure in a while.

Wed 4.30pm: Yay, I'm finally going for a manicure now.

Wed 4.45pm: Reached Bangsar.

Guess what I forgot to do -_-

For hire: PA

2012-02-01T12:41:00.002+08:00

Job description: fetch the paper , make some coffee , sit on the lappy, make the boss horny

bitchy, not itchy

2012-01-31T23:18:00.000+08:00

A friend lamented on his fb about how his friends got married recently while he's still single. Told him upfront that it's not that he can't get married but he couldn't make up his mind on which he wanted. There was the girl who told him on the second date that she's fine to settle down with a small wedding, no grand kenduri required. She didn't even care that she drives a better car than he does.

Then there was the ex who got back with him then dumped him (again). Or it could be a 'mutual' separation.
And today he tells me that there's this other chick he's going out with. With that many choices, our friend is actually spoilt rotten. The only problem is he couldn't make his mind up on which. Technically, he could just take all of them since he has 4spots anyway.

you itchy, cannot decide. want this, want that.

eh hello, not itchy la.

yes, so many for you to pick but you don't want. me is what you call not itchy.

why?

nobody to pick from. at all T_T

eh hello, you is not itchy. you is bitchy.

Meh........ I got bitchy (look) meh?

ultra man amy

2012-01-31T23:02:00.003+08:00

I've always wanted to try these but didn't. The guilt of loading up on the carbs and cholesterol over powers my cravings. But once, jason and kenneth bought some criss cross potato and offered me some. Ever since then , I've been hooked on it. Thankfully, my laziness bars me from venturing out of the office much. If at all.
Usually just ask people to tapao for me or just moan like a whale or starve to death. Rofl.

One fine afternoon, busy with work and way too famished to walk out, I ordered dee to buy our lunch instead =D My energy level dipped so low that I was running on reserve battery. Asked her to get me the squid and potato.

eh don't have the squid.

fine, potato then. the criss cross

also don't have.

wtf? what they have

the usual deep fried don't have. only got potato croquette

T_T oklor get me two of those pls. tq

They looked like ultraman's eggs . When I showed it to dee and danny,they went

But it is funny. Maybe not so obvious here but try it yourself.

Review: La Gomera, D'sara Perdana

2012-01-31T22:23:00.001+08:00

Lunch date bought a pair of deals for this place and since he couldn't get anyone else, I offered myself up for it Yes, myself invitations need to stop at one point or another. But ... but ... we did agree before that to try this place but couldn't find the right date/time when both of us were available. It just so happened that weekend we were both free. Just so happened that he hadn't used his coupons yet. So, it worked out just fine. I wasn't being an advantageous bitch.

They didn't have anymore seats inside so we settled for outdoor which wasn't so bad with the breeze blowing constantly. Must be the location.

His first plate. We were both really starved. Me especially since it was my first meal of the day.

My first kill. Of the entire plate, sorry to all you buffet lovers, I love the rice the most. It had that slight spice taste to it together with the seafood. A very good combo. The pasta was just so so. Lasagne, well, I've never really liked them so no. Seafood marinara spaghetti was decent.

Veggies being veggies, ok la.

Second plate. Obviously he slowed down after the first major kill.

See that white fluff? It's crab stick meat salad with hard boiled egg yolk on top of a toast. The weirdest thing we ate for that day. Can't put to words what's wrong or missing but the flavours are all out.

The octopus was somewhat over cooked (but I don't care, I like them). The hard boiled egg wasn't anything special at all, except for that dollop of mayo basil on top. I would have thought it's like deviled egg but no. They were just too lazy.

Cold mixed veggie salad with the sausage was ok la. Technically, the rest of the stuff were just average.

Pizza crust was a little too thick.

Most of the meat overall didn't look that appetizing and somewhat overcooked. Even the chicken sausage wasn't spared *sigh

We only managed to salvage leftovers for the different meat stews because there was a long line before us and we didn't bother to wait. Too hungry lar. This is what you end up with for not being patient :( Leftovers.
But at least the beef stew was good, cooked until just tender. The seafood also not bad.

The chicken was also quite right. Should have waited and dived right into this instead.

Say hello to Captain Ackbar.

His dessert. I was too stuffed by then.

Will I go there again? No.

guilt tripping

2012-01-30T23:29:00.000+08:00

The week of eating like a glutton without shame has come to an end. Or at least need to before I balloon up any further. Took some pictures of myself took and ack! My face is so round now. Can't be the new hair cut which doesn't make that much of a difference to my face, only my boobies.

My hair no longer covers my boobies. *sniff
Last night was my last indulgence night as I cooked instant noodle with sausages and an egg for dinner. The coming week would be diet galore. Heck, even attempted to start back my diet plan at work today.
How did it go?

Was so hungry when I got to the office that I bought a cheese and egg sandwich. Finished it with my coffee.
Barely mid morning, the hunger pangs struck again. This time, got myself a spicy tuna sandwich. Also downed it with (more) coffee. Lunch got dragged later and later until I couldn't stand it at 1.30pm. Had a mandarin orange. For lunch. Yes, that was my lunch.

Guilt was getting the better of me by then that the hunger reduced. Guilt always catches me in the wrong place, wrong time.
But that's really how you look at it. After about 2 hours, I was hungry again and this time, it was back with a vengeance. Not sure if it was just a PMS or the coffee overdoes (had 2 big cups of it in the morning) that my back and lower abdomen started cramping quite bad. Made a quick dash to the loo but nothing . False alarm but I was writhing in pain. Can't tell if it's better for PMS to make me crave for anything and everything or to have it make me loose my appetite and put me in so much pain.

Nvm, pain is good. It teaches one to have higher tolerance. Builds up stamina. Whatever there is . I'm sure the pain will come to some good. Eventually. Surely.

Review: Alexis, Bangsar

2012-01-30T23:09:00.001+08:00

OK, so it's the same review but in clearer picture. Like watching normal TV then switching to HD.

The place wasn't that crowded that night but there was a mini hen's night there. Bunnies. For real.
They were dressed in short skirts/dresses with the ears to boot. Oh such lovely view that I deprived the birthday boy off. Why? Because I want to see them better. Hence I made him sit facing the entrance while my seat was opposite theirs. Not a direct clear view but much better than his.

To which he made a fuss about it. Tee hee.

My birthday present to him ^_^ It was after dinner and it had been awhile since I had this so might as well kill two birds with one stone.

It was still as good. Lovely crunchy nuts with the soft sponge which was a little too soggy.

Review: Antipodean Cafe, Bangsar

2012-01-30T22:36:00.000+08:00

Justin suggested this place when I was in Bangsar . I'm always game for any place that I've not tried before. It was around Christmas, hence the festive note.

Bottle of water. I've always liked them. Used to collect Esprit bottles and use them to fill up with drinking water. Plastic bottles were never quite my thing. Glass bottles are more hygienic to me as I can fill it up with hot water and kill all the germs away. Sadly, the rust/dust/dirty stuff still collect at the bottom after awhile just like how my vodka bottle is :( Need to buy those flexible bottle cleaner.

His cappuccino. Apparently, the last time he was there, they drew for him a heart. This time, it was a flower.
Perhaps the other time was a secret love letter?

His open ploughman's sandwich. Different from what I had previously.

Is it good?I don't know, didn't try the chicken. Only the potato salad.

Cold mayo potato salad. I love potatoes (maybe because I am one too) but cold potato salad is one of those things that I find hard to like. This was pretty decent. Bite size potatoes without an overpowering dressing.
No beetroot for me to stain my teeth =B

Smoked salmon, chickpeas, roasted vege.

It was my first time eating cold roasted veggie. Somewhat soft and squishy, not sure if it's my liking. Sure, it's different but the novelty wears off after like the 2nd piece. Tastes almost bland but the cheese did save it. A little as that's just what they gave. A little bit of cheese.

Chick pea salad. Reminds me of pico de gallo which I have been meaning to try to make for ages. Love this as it was refreshing , a little citrusy and a good crunch different from the soggy veggie. Bits of raw onion to give it that extra punch.

The only reason I put up with the other side dishes: smoked salmon. The first time I'm having an actual meal of smoked salmon The other time which I could remember of having smoked salmon was a takeaway. It was a Sunday and I was in The Curve. Somehow, I got lucky that night and got to spend the night with teddy. While waiting for him to finish up stuff with the then-gf, got myself dinner and brought it to his place.

Offered him some but he refused.

i don't like smoked salmon. not nice.

He likes them fresh only :( Not sure if that has changed now.
Yes, patience is virtue. It's not the waiting that is unbearable. If anything, I could wait given a specific time frame. It is only when there doesn't appear to be an end in sight that kills.

Review: Lorong Seratus Tahun, PJ SS2

2012-01-30T21:36:00.001+08:00

We came here for breakfast because my mother wanted to go shopping. It's a little unenvironmentally friend for me to drive from PJ to Klang to pick her up then back to PJ/KL for shopping. Why not meet halfway?

A number of people commented that this place isn't as good anymore after they renovated the place while hiking up the price. For someone who's probably never going to step foot again in Penang for a long, long time, this would be the best that I can reach for.

As I wasn't feeling that well, I ordered a honey lemon tea. A friend pissed me off when he came out of the blue and asked me out for lunch/dinner. When I told him that I wasn't felling well, he retorted:

how come you're always falling sick ah?

It's not my fault you're always looking for me when I'm under the weather. I wanted to tell him:

actually, it's not that I'm sick. i just don't know how to tell you that I don't want to go out with you. At all. So I made up some lame excuse. Hoping that you'll get the hint. Oh well, obviously not.

Good ol' barley and iced coffee. Ever since that fateful Monday morning, my coffee ritual has never been the same. No other coffee has came close to the powerful aroma of hot Chinese coffee. It's like an almost orgasmic sensation. Sure it made me shitbrix but to hell with it. A good coffee deserves all the accolades it can get and Chinese coffee You may be the best thing ever since the fridge came about. Or Good Samaritans who keeps feeding me leftovers. Or sliced bread if you want to go the conventional way but I'm not such a fan of those.Oh Chinese coffee, when will I ever get to taste you again? To smell you, to intoxicate my senses with your very essence.

Oh Chinese coffee.

Prawn noodles. My father loves it with cockles while I find that they lend the soup a rather peculiar taste. Maybe that's what he likes most about it?

Like pretty big cockles. Ever since I was in high school after my parents scared me off about getting some form of Hepatitis from eating dirty cockles, I've refrained myself from eating it. At all.
Actually, that is a true story (someone in the family did get Hepatitis from dirty roadside stall).

I have to say that at RM 6.50, it isn't over priced as the portion wasn't that small. It's just that the taste was just so-so. Better than the usual Klang Valley version but certainly not on par with the original version.

Penang chicken lobak . My father kicked a fuss when this came and was nagging my mother on why she didn't order the other set with the full works. Reason being I ordered it as I didn't want us to eat too much which is what we usually do. It's hard trying to maintain a healthy lifestyle with my father. Okla, nothing healthy at all about this meal but hey I try.
The lobak was a little over fried so was kinda charred. No good.

Deep fried bean curd skin. Love to dip this in the sweet sticky sauce. Beer grub. But also fattening because it's deep fried =(

For myself, it was just half boiled eggs and toast with kaya/butter.

Whenever I order a set of half boiled eggs (which usually comes in a pair), those who never ate with me before would be surprised that I would break one, eat it then only break the second egg.
Like it's weird.

That has always been the way I eat my half boiled eggs. Given my ~~slow~~ enjoyable pace of eating, I didn't want to risk the second egg turning cold. Hence, left it for later. That's my logic. That was how it has always been since I was young. Or at least since I ~~knew~~ had to crack my own eggs. My parents said anything about it. Never did they ask why one and not two together.

Why my parents let me grow up into a little weirdo? T_T
But, I am thankful that they let me do what I please, different or not.
That just means I'm special, unique and not just another sucker in the faceless crowd.

the slut/wife

2012-01-30T20:59:00.000+08:00

That night after I got rather high and he got rather excited that I was high, we were just entertaining ourselves with the bartender at Hoofed. Sitting at the bar, waiting for him to mix our drinks, we looked at the liquor pourers with amazement. If I didn't know better, I'd say we were both officially stoned/high though neither of us had any joint to begin with.

Evidently, anyone (or at least the both of us) liked the left one better as it was classy and shiny and modernistic unlike the right plasticky feel. Unfortunately, mr bartender begged to differ and would choose the plastic one anytime. Why, we wondered given the grace and beautiful of the steel one. Apparently, the plastic pourer is able to seal the opening of the bottle better, without spilling any alcohol out when they actually pourt it out while the steel one has a tendency to leak. Also, the flow from the plastic pourer is easier to control.

For some odd reason, my brain was on an intellectual high and said:

that's just like the slut and the wife

The both looked at me bewildered in unison and asked me how that conclusion came about. Simply because:

men want a wife who may not look good but at least she provides for the family, cares for the kids whereas the slut/mistress isn't expected to do all that but just look good for them to show off to their friends.

Isn't that true?

blast from the past

2012-01-30T20:49:00.001+08:00

One of the guys from the other team was using this mug. Neither him nor his partner claimed ownership over it, claiming he's loaning it from the other. One went to the extent of saying it was his wife who bought it for him.

And he turned out to be the cuter one. Sigh.

Review: Noodle Shack, 1Utama

2012-01-30T20:46:00.001+08:00

christine asked me out for lunch one fine day and recommended me this place. Never tried it before, so ok, lets go.

We managed to get a table as we were there before the 12.30pm crowd appeared. Poor kid looked like he's been waiting for ages but service wasn't that slow nor did the food take that long to appear. A tad bit of waiting but not enough to starve you.

The half open kitchen. The place looks rather hygienic. Most of the staff appear to be from China judging from their accent. It's strange that christine doesn't speak Cantonese at all nor does she understand it that well yet her boss would speak to her in that dialect.

She just picks up the keywords and works with that =_="""
I had an almost similar issue today but with an Indian user who was rambling off with that thick Indian accent. It's like full stops don't exists in the Indian English grammar. Or syntax.

This is her traditional flat noodles with minced meat and an egg and sambal chilli shrimps.

This is my flat noodle with minced chicken and salted fish. Quite good as the noodle weren't clumpy though it wasn't too heavy with oil. Give it a good toss before tucking in so that the saltiness is all over.

Stuffed tofu in black bean sauce. Love the crispy outer layer and airy fluffy inside. Not too salty. Goes well with the noodles.
The chilli sauce was also quite good though not spicy enough. I love it hot.

The other locations. I never heard of Paradigm Mall tbh.

dream a little dream

2012-01-30T08:13:00.004+08:00

How appropriate to read about this after having a dream and remembering it up to this point.

what was the case about?

some site support who didn't check in the system before escalating the issue.

and the user had to call in 8 times for that?!?~!?!

i'm afraid so.

we could have just solved it there and then.

yes but it wasn't assigned to us so we didn't.

get the call. get the call .

it's gone . and i'm so sleepy.

that's what the earphones are for, woman.

huh?

there , look at him. just plug it in and go to sleep.

Man.... if only it was real. On a side note:

It's now at 253 =_=

post CNY blues

2012-01-29T23:17:00.001+08:00

Technically, CNY lasts for 15 days so there are still about 7days left before the hairstylists and Chinese stalls stop charging exorbitant prices. One more week, matey.

Don't be such a wussy/bitch and complain about having to go back to work.

I already started on last Friday itself.
Here's to a good week ahead while I wait for the pill to kick in.

Bali Day# 3: So long, farewell

2012-01-29T23:11:00.001+08:00

Third and last instalment of the Bali trip. Have you enjoyed it so far?

Iven brought us to one last place for lunch before we headed back home. Well, me home, ed going to KL with me.

This is a very strange sweet drink. Could give you diabetic.
Condensed milk, sirap bandung, soda water. The whole works. Even just looking at it is giving me a sugar rush.

Oh my love, my love

Blanched spinach with chilli. I love their chilli as it's raw and spicy. Unlike the local boring cut chili padi or Chinese prawn chilli sauce. My father made some rather kick arse chilli over CNY. But too much of pounding and beating for me to do on my own :(

Salty roasted peanuts and onions with chilli sweet marinade.

Chicken cooked in curry chilli. Not sure how to describe it. It was really spicy. You could just feel the heat.

Something non spicy. Deep fried chicken which I didn't get to try :(

Innards. I don't like. I no try.

Chicken on skewers. Slightly sweet and charred sadly. Good with the chilli sauce.

Time to fly home. Bon voyage.

Waiting to board the plane at the Bali airport. Sadly, that was when tummy decided to get all cranky on me T_T Must be the OD of chilli.

It was good to be home. With ed , nonetheless.

Bali Day# 2.4: Dinner by the sea

2012-01-29T22:20:00.000+08:00

If you're in Bali, Jimbaran is the one place you can't miss out. Beautiful beach, good food, nice breeze. A romantic walk on the beach after that if that's your thing.
I think I'd be happier if the guy comes up to me and tells me that he's gotten a place for the two of us with our names than with a walk down the beach under the moonlight. Age must really me spoiling me.

The place wasn't that crowded but I think it's because the tables were spread out and it was a large area.

Fireworks in the distant. Sorry for the lousy pictures. I still don't know how to master the fine art of night shots.

I cannot tell you how much I love teh botol. Can someone pretty please tell me where I can get them in Malaysia? I don't want to go into some overpriced Indonesian restaurant for it.

Kick ass chilli sauce.

Deep fried garlic and soy sauce.

Mini lala cooked with chilli. Over cooked. Not enough to go around the table.

Deep fried squid. It's always good even if overcooked.

Grilled fish.

Grilled shrimp.

Fresh fruits to end the day.

Bali Day# 2.3: Temple in the sea

2012-01-29T21:51:00.001+08:00

After lunch, iven drove us all to Tanah Lot for the famous temple that is located off the shore and only accessible during low tides.

This is the back of iven. Sorry, he is taken. No point taking his actual picture.

Entrance to the beach area. As it was almost Christmas when we were there, there were quite a number of tourists. Or is it just crowded during all times of the year?

A deity. It's not unusual to see them all over Bali.

What was unusual though is that although there are a number of foreign tourists, there seemed to be an equal amount of locals visiting the place too.

This should be those stage for the dance performance.

It was a beautiful day by the time we got there. It wasn't too sunny with just the right amount of breeze.

What I didn't quite like is the number of people there. Almost made me claustrophobic. Made me appreciate Krabi even more.

Side view of the stage.

Be sure to come here before the evening tide comes in . Otherwise you can just look at the temple from afar. Literally.

So.many.people.

Waves crashing to the beach. It was starting to get high tide. So we were just in the nick of time though we didn't actually go up the temple. Too many people la.

~~Fire~~ Water in the hole.

The sea was beautiful though certainly not calm.

A thought came to me one night: how far out do you need to walk into the sea before you drown?
That would depend on how tall you are eh?

The other temple on the beach.

Hoards and hoards of people.

The closest we got to the temple. Look at the line on the left.

Standing on the rocks overlooking the waves, can't help but the feel bored after awhile. Haha.

I know, I have a knack for taking strange pictures.

The water was so clean although the place was buzzing with people.

I narrowly gave my camera a shower for this shot. Please appreciate it. Even if it isn't that nice.

I would probably make the lousiest tourist guide. Hopefully anton won't make me bring him around when he's in town come March .

More water. Too bad we didn't get to waddle around in the water. Would have been fun in the weather.

It was an overall overcast day. Bliss.

Trying to avoid the water so that our feet don't get wet.

Nobody. For once.

This should be an entrance to someone's home. Yes, their entrances are always somewhat grand.

A rather cute shot. He's rather cute but thats the gf he's holding.

That's all the sight seeing for today. Next stop: dinner time.

let sleeping dogs lie

2012-01-29T21:11:00.001+08:00

Don't you have when past lovers waltz back into life like nothing happened, that the world was all right when they left you, that their presence don't bring anything but hurt, that it is perfectly all right for them to come back as and when they please, that they don't realise how much you're holding back the tears as you put up a brave front to tell them that you are ok although you are dying inside.

Don't you hate that?
This is a song dedicated to us all for times like that.

I was all right for a while, I could smile for a while
But I saw you last night, you held my hand so tight
As you stopped to say "Hello"
Aww you wished me well, you couldn't tell

That I'd been cry-i-i-i-ng over you, cry-i-i-i-ng over you
Then you said "so long". left me standing all alone
Alone and crying, crying, crying cry-i-ing
It's hard to understand but the touch of your hand
Can start me crying

I thought that I was over you but it's tru-ue, so true
I love you even more than I did before but darling what can I do-o-o-o
For you don't love me and I'll always be

Cry-i-i-i-ng over you, cry-i-i-i-ng over you
Yes, now you're gone and from this moment on
I'll be crying, crying, crying, cry-i-i-ing
Yeah crying, crying, o-o-o-o-ver you

thought of the day

2012-01-29T18:32:00.000+08:00

Le sexy time in le shower.

Me ~~gusta~~ jealous.

spoilt brat

2012-01-29T14:30:00.000+08:00

Oddly enough, one of the boys at work sent me this link, asked me to buy it for my kid.
Even if I have a kid that's old enough to play with it, I wouldn't buy it as it's an utter waste of money.

but it can swim in the air

i can throw the kid into the pool and swim too

but this is more fun la. i'm sure the kid will ask for it

sure he can ask, i'll just give him a good kick for wasting my money

I think he got a little more than freaked out with my parenting style.

the accidentals

2012-01-29T02:38:00.001+08:00

I almost forgot. Things had been rather hectic at work that most of my day is spent trying to clear off backlog. Maybe my time management is getting worse. Maybe it's due to the recent cost cutting measures. Maybe I'm just not cut out for my job anymore.
Day in, day out, it comes and goes like it always does. At times, it's as good as watching paint dry.

anything interesting happened during the dinner?

huh?

It took me a few seconds to register what he meant. In an earlier team dinner, something did happen which left a rather uncomfortable feeling in my mouth. Nothing like that happened this time around though there were a number of revelations.

One drove into a swamp once.
One has a German , pinoy gfs. We aren't sure how many more that he may have left out.
Interesting and surprising night but nothing out of the strange happened. Not to me at least.

Well, it almost did.
Do I regret that it didn't? No, not really. It would have been fun had it happened but certainly not in anyone's best interest. Not a case of once bitten, twice shy.
It's just a rather boring mundane life I am leading now.

Finally settling into the routine of singlehood, it is safe (for me) to say that it took awhile of getting used to. Like 2 months? Can't be bothered about finding someone. Can't be bothered if he loves me anymore. Can't be bothered about people who don't care about me.

Though sometimes I fall back into it. Out of habit.
Just how do you stop loving someone at the snap of a finger? Forever and ever.

I wish I know. I wish I can.

love me like you mean it

2012-01-29T02:16:00.000+08:00

For the week that I had been car-less, I had to rely on other people to get around. Although it was only for a few days of being ferried around, it felt a little strange. When was the last time I didn't have my car and it's not just sheer laziness that I didn't drive? Would have been years ago? My car has never been far from me for any longer than a day. Except during my month long SG/AU trip. After that, we were always together. Always.

Much better than what I can comment on the men in my life.
During the recent week of separation, christine had been giving me rides home. Well three times. She asked me out for lunch . Twice. During Saturday to which I declined both of it. Yes, the guilt is creeping up slowly but Saturday is me day. When I sleep till I wake up. When I do what and as a please. Going out with people would need to wait till Sunday or nightfall. At least.

Yes, my anti social streak is getting worse. And I couldn't be bothered.

Anyway, she had been giving me rides home but what about going to work?
Had another friend to give me a ride.

Do we work in the same place? No. His office is in TPM.
Is our work schedule the same? No. He's on AMER shift (read: graveyard shift).
Does he have the hots for me? No. Not anymore at least.
Why is he then? Because I asked and he is a nice chap.

I've gotten past the stage of rationalizing people's actions because half the time, I don't like what I find.
Rather, it makes me lost, frustrated , anguished ultimately trying to find the proper response to the turn of events. It's easier not having to deal with it at all. The only way for that is never to let it happen in the first place. But always, shit happens and I've learnt to just live and let die.

On my own, it is simple to just brush the nagging suspicions aside, put it at the back of my head and let my goldfish memory work their wonders to magically wave their wand and poof, the memory of it fades into oblivion.
One could easily deduce something was up. One doesn't simply leave work in TPM , drive to Bandar Utama to go to work at 1Utama before heading back home at Bangsar. No, not according to my boss.

so he's dropping you off at work?

yes.

wait, i thought he stays in Bangsar?

yes, then he goes back home after dropping me in the office?

does he love you?

The strange thing is , he isn't the first to propose that idea. A few others have came up with about the same notion but I never gave much thought about it. For one, I knew there was an inkling of truth in it.

During the early stage of our friendship, there was something hanging in the air between us. I never pinpointed it to a crush for it wasn't something that I saw in him, hence the reason for not pursuing it further. Thankfully, he didn't either and it wasn't until late last year, about 2years into our friendship that the beans were spilt.

Somehow, he managed to pick up the right signs at all the right time and decided not to take our friendship beyond that. To which I am truly thankful for. One less crush to deal with is always a welcomed thought. It's not that there is a line of boys outside waiting to have a chance with me. Or that I am the village bicycle. Lets just say that my attention/concentration/effort span is at its bare minimum.

yes he loves me.

ok that's good

just like how he loves all his other friends.

That is the truth. He always says that he loves me. Like how I always say I hate him.
He loves me like how he loves all his other friends. I hate him like how I hate anyone and everyone who don't give into my whims.
Words are so easily and casually flung out these days that they lose their meanings soon enough.

you love me just like you love him and him and her
yes, i happen to love everyone . you included
which is why it makes your love somewhat worthless.

i beg to differ .

It wasn't a fight. Merely a conversation that I had one day with him over fb. How is it that he kept going on about loving me despite me hating him. It's a love/hate friendship though now it is quite bordering to annoying. In a way, I am thankful that we never got beyond the friend zone. Can't deal with all his loves. I'd either die of jealous or die in vain hopes that he'll love me in a different way.

During the dinner, I made a rather lame attempt to increase my market value by getting him to employ me at his new office . In front of my current big boss. Lol. Lame attempt is lame but you can't blame a girl for trying. I was hoping something like this would happen but the contrary actually happened:

No , no. Not them kissing but them negotiating on how best to keep me / take me. Lol.

but you don't like night shift.

true but I can save on petrol

how?

i drive to your place then we go to work together =D

right, maybe you can rent a room in my house too.

My big boss had to interject then with the killer line:

yea after that you guys can get married too.

We both had nothing to say and ended it with nervous laughs. That was the night I can safely say that there would be nothing more that could spark out of our friendship.

b ^ w

2012-01-29T01:37:00.001+08:00

I like this series of black and white shots. Like not love as I would have preferred a softer theme, less brute, more sexy than the in-your-face.
This would be my rather fail attempt at b/w shot though the b/w is actually post PS processing:

Bali Day# 2.1: Daytime misc

2012-01-29T01:08:00.001+08:00

Yes, my brain ran out of juice and couldn't come up with something more creative. It was initially titled Breakfast for King but scrolling through the pictures, seemed like there are a number of other scenes too. Oh well, this is a collection of what happened during the second day of my Bali trip.

We had breakfast at the hotel. Nothing too special. The standard buffet spread. Pretty limited as a matter of fact but at least the food was fresh.

This it the pool. Quite puny but gives for good relaxation especially in the hot evenings.
It was rather odd though to be seeing some ang mohs lounging by the pool side, sun tanning. In the morning.

A simple breakfast to kick start the day. It certainly lost to the previous day's breakfast but I reckon it's good to have something simple. Too much of chilli and spices can make the tummy unhappy.

My omelette. Today I cooked lunch of leftover from last year. It sounds quite bad but ... but... it's barely a month since 2012 started. That can't be too bad though when did I get the left over... that, I honestly have no idea. All I knew was it was sitting in the fridge waiting to be eaten. It's a bad habit of mine but my grandmother brought me up not to waste food

Fresh tropical fruits for good digestion.
That's ed's fingers btw. A rather funny story unfolded these few nights.

I've been a member of few dating websites which they inadvertently started spamming my mailbox with potential suitors. One turned out to be rather pleasing to the eyes, in the right age group and heck, he is in Sydney. Can't hurt.
We talked and the first thing I noticed is his cheerfulness. Reminded me of ed instantly. There is a fear in me that he may actually be friends with ed but after ~~stalking~~ looking through his fb profile, nope. Coast is clear This is how I look like. Late night sleepings, lack of sleep.

After breakfast, iven picked us up to go to a local spa. Sorry, forgot the name.

The strange thing about Bali is that most of the properties are available for sale/rent. Like summer houses. Some of them are even converted into business e.g. cafes, boutique hotels.

Last I heard, you can even go there and rent a wife. During your stay/business with them, they'll treat you like their husband, cook and wash for you. I'm sure that it would include intercourse as well. What rate, no idea. This is just what I heard.

It was my first time at a spa. Sorry, it just seems to be a rather frivolous thing for me to spend on. Sure, it was relaxing and destressing but it just doesn't justify the slight burn on my pocket. Perhaps, I've been born wrongly as a woman ;(

After a great lunch, we dropped by iven's house. He has two dogs. Very cute ones.

This is a bitch. I mean she's a female dog. Very tame and manja.

Don't be fooled. This was actually quite big. But friendly at the same time. They loved having the company, running around us.

We were around Tanah Lot when the boys decided to have some snack. I never particularly fancied grilled/roasted corn on cob. Never tried it before as a matter of fact. Or even those sold in cups. What's so nice about them? =\

doink

2012-01-28T17:50:00.001+08:00

Slept at around 2am ~~last night~~ this morning. Woke up at around 10.30am when my mother called to ask if I would like to join them for breakfast in PJ SS2. Thought that it would be a good idea but my head decided otherwise as it slowly started to pound and the weather was lovely to just sleep in, so I did.

Finally woke up at 3pm.
Yeap , that was a 12 hour slumber. Good stuff.
Went online to do some light reading before slowly dragging myself to the bathroom to wash up. While washing my face, found that I had like flaky skin all over my face.

Ok, time to do a scrub. Which I did and found bits and pieces on my palm.
After awhile, it dawned on me.

It's my hands that are dry and flaky, not my face -_-
This usually happens out of the blue although I'm not one to slap on some lotion/moisturiser every single day. Only when it looked necessary. Like today.
Perhaps its something to do with my new body shampoo. Hmm..

The girlfriend

2012-01-28T01:30:00.002+08:00

In a few more days, his stay would be over and he'll be flying back to work. Not that far apart, just 6hours of flight away. Just a call/text away. Just an ocean apart.

Still not that far apart we would be.

A friendship that spanned across a decade although we did hook up in the middle and broken that off when it didn't work out. Would the years of silent in between count as I recollect myself and grow to become the person that I am today? People change, so he tells me. Did I? Mellowed, perhaps but deep down inside, I believe I am still the same person that I was a decade ago. Only now, there is no energy, no reason, no logic left to fight against the current that my defiant self became dormant.

We had a conversation few months ago. It may have been at the worst of times or I anticipated the worst out of it that I didn't pay full attention to it, afraid of what the reality may reveal. My fears somewhat materialized but part of me was shut away in that far away land, the one that I usually run to when I am at a lost, when all is gone, when helplessness shrouds my day, my night. It's not the nicest of feeling for someone who has given up everything in order to avoid that feeling. Whatever that remains behind, I have a certain amount of control over.

In my hands , lay their life and death. Their existence and absence lies solely on my judgement. That is the life that has become mine. And that was how I intended it to be.

Faced with the daunting fact that the little signs I picked up could lead to that, I asked myself how best to deal with it. Do I face it head on or do I diddle until the imminent? Choosing the latter, feigning ignorance does appear to be the next best course of action. It took awhile before that worked its charm but eventually it did. My fear didn't grown into a full blown monster, died with a slight whimper. A triumphant win. Of sorts. But given enough nourishment, it is bound to come and possibly bite me in my non-existent rear end. Oh lord , good lord. Please don't let me say Your name in vain.

You were standing there by the gate. You were smiling at me. You were waiting to board the plane.
You were there.
I was there too. Looking at you. Should I smile? Should I cry? Should I wave and go "Bon voyage"?

Thankfully, my brain didn't have to kill anymore innocent cells as you ended that awkward moment (by my definition) when you came over. It wasn't a letter, rather, a text.
You sent me a text and asked me to read it.

Somewhat dumbstruck, I looked at my phone and opened your text. There it read:

will you be my girlfriend?

the ever loving, forgiving God

2012-01-28T00:19:00.001+08:00

How true.

i see dead people

2012-01-28T00:13:00.000+08:00

It was a rather old apartment. The stair case was at the ends and in the middle of the complex. There was a lift in the middle but I took the staircase instead. The wall wasn't brown but a darker shade of yellow. Past beige, an almost hideous yellow stain like the stain on a smoker's teeth. I quickened my pace . Where to, that part didn't register in my memory.

There weren't anyone , not in sight at least but there were signs of a society living. It was late evening, the sun barely starting its descent into the west. Where are the people, the occupants of this apartment, thoughts raced through my mind as my legs climbed the steps before coming to a particular floor. I decided to walk along the corridors to see if what I was looking for is to be found there.

Finally, some signs of life. Although they are all old and hanging for dear life, the occupants of this apartment were going about with their lives in slow motion. An old man was using his walker to navigate around the stair case. Another old woman was walking around the corridor. What were they doing, where they headed to, are as elusive as what my search is for.

Suddenly, the lift door opens and out comes a woman. A nurse, no doubt, wheeling another old woman out. They make their way to a particular unit. The nurse fumbled for the keys in a pocket for awhile before triumphantly fishing it out. With a smile on her face. She was a breath of fresh air amidst all the old people that I had been surrounded with. Perhaps this is where my search ends.

Smiling, she started to push the wheelchair into the unit but the door wouldn't budge. Slightly disgruntled, she forced the chair but it still wouldn't go in a the old woman got slightly petrified. The other old people stopped in their motion, standing like statues to watch the drama unfolding right before their eyes. I too was shocked and couldn't help but be caught up in that moment.

To my horror, the nurse placed a plastic bag over the old woman's head. Covering her. The old lady looked like she was suffocating . In a few moments, her eyes started to roll and her mouth was agape, sucking in what was left of the air in her newly confined space. The nurse, oblivious or just not bothered, whistled a happy tune and gave the chair a powerful jerk to push it in that the old woman's feet came up. The chair was now on its two hind wheels only.

That was when I noticed the old woman's feet were also wrapped in plastic as well.
It was turning out to be like a horror movie where people are being murdered before their time was up. Frozen for a second, my mind willed my leg to carry my body to the nearest staircase which was just beside the lift. Momentum was slow and it felt like my legs were glued to the floor. Yet, I was the only one making a dash. The rest of the spectators were nonchalant about it. Like it was a norm.

It was so surreal.

how could this be?

2012-01-27T23:38:00.000+08:00

First and lasts day of work. Had been rather tiring since the other guy was on leave while another starts only at 9am. So that meant only me to attend to their queries. Took it in my stride although I did lose my cool few times. The day started to drag longer, time passing by slower. Until it was finally time to go home.

Bought dinner. Ate it while watching a movie. That's when it started.
Elaine asked me out for dinner tomorrow.
cw asked me out for movie tomorrow.
marc asked me out (well, kinda) for tomorrow.

Tomorrow, tomorrow. How did you suddenly get so filled up suddenly?
Amy, Amy. How did you become so wanted suddenly?

Is it pity speaking, I wonder.

so true.

2012-01-27T17:07:00.001+08:00

Though mine is usually

Before 8am
Before I have my coffee
When I am in the middle of something

shine high, shine bright

2012-01-27T16:21:00.000+08:00

Do over achievers demotivate you further instead of making you strive to work harder?

first day back to work...

2012-01-27T09:44:00.000+08:00

And what to do?

The pain of 110 MB email quota .
Pfft.

it's flyday flyday

2012-01-26T23:56:00.000+08:00

I've not heard of the infamous song from Rebecca Black nor do I intend to.
But hell yea, it's Friday.
Ops, does hell count as a curse word?

On a side note .................. MY HAIR T_T
It's going to be awhile.

your highness

2012-01-26T22:54:00.002+08:00

Read this news on today's newspaper. I miss the touch of newspaper on my fingertips. The ink leaving a slight invisible smear on my skin. The smell of it lingering in the air.

Ah good old newspaper. If not because you cost RM 1.20/day and contribute to more trees being felled, I'd buy you too. Oh and that you take up way too much space.

Back to the news, it starts of quite believable. How did he get to Holland and London, lets just say that he probably is quite loaded even before discovering that he is of royal descendant. It is after the part where he reached Hong Kong that it all got ridiculous. Meeting an immortal old couple,treasure even more than those in the movie. The icing on the cake would be:

“This means that 86.7% of the world's money belongs to me,” he said.

Like right.

Turning (7 * 4)

2012-01-26T01:09:00.002+08:00

I'm sure you all could work out that simple math. This is a very much belated post. My birthday post from more than 2months ago. Still getting accustomed to the thought of being 28 that having to say I turn 29 this year is strange. Very foreign. Come 2013 (if we ever get pass 21 Dec 2012), I'll just say "I am happy to be still alive up to this point".
Very depressing to say that it would be the year of the 3-0.

These are the flowers which I ~~blackmailed~~ requested for. In exchange for these, he asked for this. Quite a fair trade if not for my lack of culinary skill. The flowers were gorgeous though even if not my favourite red posies, a good breath of difference.
Oh and on the table is the necklace which justin got for me along with a red beach dress from Bali. Not exactly my taste but it's the thought that counts. The refund policy probably works if you are close to the other person. Can't blame justin as he was buying clothing and he doesn't know me that well. Not my clothes taste at least.

My very first birthday cake. And possibly the only. The other cake doesn't count as I didn't get to blow out candles. Nor were there anyone to sing me the birthday song when I ate it :(

Very the horny looking icing. Speaking about horny, I was feeling relatively horny one Saturday after getting lunch from the nearby mamak. No, it wasn't some hot sweaty ah neh who turned me on (God forbid should any of his sweat drip onto my packet of curry rice) but it was just the middle of my cycle. Went home. Looked at my list of movies and decided to watch Bridesmaid.

And what do you know, the opening act itself saw the main character humping there.
Nice. JUST NICE.

See how nice my birthday cupcake is? The niceness is only exterior because it tastes quite crappy.

It was an early birthday celebration courtesy of chris as I was going on leave for the rest of the week which included my birthday. What was planned? Nothing. What for the long leave then? To clear it or risk having to burn them -_- If the company ever decides to buy them back, I'd be the first to sell them. Or if possible, auction it to other employees. Ah ha. That would be a good scheme.

As again, miss my long long (straight) hair T_T
On a side note, does swearing in abbreviations e.g. fml, wtf means I am cussing as well? I'd like to think not.
The next question is , if I don't speak in foul language but thinks in it (just like how I went "mofo you stupid phone for not telling me you're running low on battery until now when I'm going to bed"), does it mean I've broken my resolution?

My very first meal in my 28th year. Hakka noodles for him.

Sarawak kolo mee for me. Quite tasty and very big portion. A little on the dry side as it wasn't that oily which I suppose is a good thing. Lots of minced pork to go with it too.

The MSG soup. Lolololol.

ZipperPal from Dee. When she handed it to me, I was on call.

did you notice I pass by your place just now?

oh no. i was on call.

yea i could tell. i left your birthday gift on your keyboard

oh wait... what... oh yea, that... thanks.

That's just how absent minded I can be when I'm in the middle of something. Multi tasking is a foreign concept/skill to me. Looking at it, I was curious to know why anyone would want to hook this onto their zipper. After all, we don't want our zips to be undone/unzipped that easily but this device appears to be doing otherwise.

After few minutes of thinking, it dawned on me that it's for your bag zipper not clothings

Bag from Harrods from my sister who went to UK with the bf. Don't mind the scary ghost on the top left.
Left the tag still on.

Eh, please cut the tag away

why la... lazy

you want people to know where it's from ah? can tell la just looking at the front.

Really, I am just too lazy.

English tea from Harrods. I still have some Chamomile and honey left which I should finish it soon, lest they expire. Just that it'll put me in that nice sleepy mode which I am now . Thanks to that sleeping pill. Again.

A little Vietnamese hat from their trip to Vietnam (duh). It's too small to fit my head.

Earrings from mommy. I think she ran out of ideas on what to get. It was either this or a pair of pearl earrings which went to my sister as pearls are more suitable for ~~older~~ more matured women.

This is how they look like.

Fret not. My birthday (Nov 16th) may have long gone but my doors are still open for birthday presents. Always.

getting to know you

2012-01-26T00:06:00.001+08:00

After watching this video, I took the test to see which type I am. Turned out that it's ISTJ:
Introverted 78
Sensing    1
Thinking 50
Judging 44
Just that who'd thought my introverted would be that high.
Still, it doesn't answer how to deal with people of different personality type =\

so you think you can model?

2012-01-25T23:32:00.001+08:00

According to this, there are a few different types of model that you can be:

Mo art: a combination of the words 'model' and 'artist,' this term refers to singers and actresses who also model.
Geuk mo: aspirants who have the legs of a pin-up girl but a face for radio become these leg models.
Chiu mo: too ugly to be a model, yet still desperate enough to make the effort.
Yaam mo: too ugly to be a model, too tone deaf to be a singer, but might still have a voice for dubbing foreign language films.

Perhaps, my best bet would be yaam mo though its uncanny pronunciation may make people think of the nether region wouldn't be such good publicity. Though, as any good marketeer would say, there is no such thing as bad publicity. Any publicity is good publicity .

HK, here I come~

racial tolerance

2012-01-25T21:47:00.003+08:00

When I saw this on my fb feed, I was very pissed off:

haih tak boleh ke gov put up a rules on time duration for playing the fireworks!!sgt irritating..lg2 kalau kul 2am pun kebom lg sana sini..grrrrrrrr

No points for guessing which race this is. I was very tempted to reply with this but someone said it would be a very massive flame:

at least it's just once or max thrice a year. not every week. every month. every year.

And just for the record, try staying in Klang the capital of Chinese people and if you are here for the ninth day prayers, it'll be even more fun. I hate it too but it's a yearly thing, it doesn't clog up the road unnecessarily. People don't exactly double park. I don't need to spend an hour just to go back from the office should I decide to drive out for lunch.

And so before you go about ranting about some things, please look at your own backyard.

get me outta here

2012-01-25T21:38:00.001+08:00

The one thing that annoys me is those ads on my phone while playing games.
And there's no way to turn it off except if my wifi is turned off. The sort of ads that they put on is usually those dodgy sex ads, and in this case, pretty girl in the room. That I feel syok -_- No wonder it took me awhile to actually finish this game... Like after 3months . So frigging long.

Lousy gadis cantik kept interrupting me. Go away.
On a side note, it would be damn scary if there is any in my room since I am usually alone.

Somehow, they all decided to just come up at the same time -_-
Never seen that many notifications before. Ever.

After I uploaded an album, they started to like the photos. Like almost ALL of them. At the same time.
Argh. I just can't take too many things at one time.

the day the earth phone died

2012-01-25T21:32:00.001+08:00

I overestimated my phone battery that I overslept as there was no alarm no wake me up :(
For the past week, my sleeping pattern has experienced some abnormality. Not a total opposite but bedtime's extended to 1-2am, waking up at 10am. It's fine except when Friday comes alone.

Waking up at 6am will be quite a bitch.
Even today itself , waking up at 9am was such a total pain. No thanks to the sleeping pill the night before. And waking up in the middle of the night feeling the heat. Yes, woke up to just turn on the a/c -_- No more a/c tomorrow night onwards. That would be another interesting challenge.

Work oh work.
Suddenly I am tempted to resign and just sleep and sleep and sleep.

shopping galore

2012-01-25T21:23:00.002+08:00

Some of the few clothes that I tried while shopping. Is it because I am getting old and poor or that CNY just doesn't bring any joy anymore but another day to rest? Somewhat sad that it is losing its touch. Maybe I am really losing my culture.

Love the shimmery skirt and how it's paired with the purple top. Sweet and demure on the top but glammed up on the bottom.

Thought of getting it for work but it's just a little too glittering for the office :( What to do, I rarely go out these days so most of my clothes are meant for the office.

Ok la, so it's my fault also that the lazy bug bites me . Perpetually.

A sweet pink top with lace trimming on the top.

I really liked this top as it was quite figure hugging which is also the same reason for not buying it. Get fat and dang, it shows . But it was a really sweet top. Good to pair with jeans.

A corset like top with lace and soft velvet lines.

Figure hugging but not as unforgiving as the previous pink top. Pretty affordable at RM 30ish.

This looked quite nice on the hanger (like they always do) and this is the end result.

Somehow, I think my sis bought a top similar to this.

Ok, why did I even try this? Because it looked so prim and proper. I have always wanted to be those English lady.

Unfortunately, obviously, this image just isn't meant for me.

This looked quite good. Silky, satin black dress with a decent neckline. Unfortunately, the price tag didn't agree with my purse.

A Carven dress would set you back by about RM 100. At least =(

Also another Carven dress which at least didn't look good.
Eh please la, it really did look nice on the rack. Maybe I just didn't have big racks to fill the dress.

While waiting for justin for dinner, I popped by F-Block which was opposite of the restaurant. Love the tank top with the lace trimming.

Admittedly, my love for lace is a new one due to boo.
He's the main reason why my wardrobe is starting to fill up with lacy stuff. Well, there have been a number of them at present but have more brownie points now.

The strange Grecian maxi dress which apparently failed because of my lack of jugs.

Sigh. If only it would be easy to just grow a pair of breasts.

santa baby

2012-01-25T19:36:00.002+08:00

Somehow, in exchange for something from Australia, ck asked me to wear a santarina costume. This may or may not fit the bill but I'm guessing more likely not to. What's people obsession with the naughty santa's helper? What makes you even think I fit the naughty bill? :P

Here's a little something better to whet your appetite:

it's all right

2012-01-25T19:33:00.001+08:00

Don't suffer in silence! Come to me. And I'll make you come.
Pun intended.

drink ALL the alcohol

2012-01-25T19:26:00.001+08:00

Or so that is what appeared to be arun's agenda when I agreed to meet up with him on that fateful Friday night for drinks. After we were done with dinner at TDH, he decided to hit upstairs , "Just to check out what they have".

That ended up with few shots down. Though few would have been multiple if I didn't whine and rant and bitch. Ok la, not that bad but it was getting quite challenging trying to maintain my composure given the copious amount of alcohol in my blood stream. Enough to make me think that he was trying to hit on me.

Which I think he was given how after he dropped me off, he called me to 'talk'. For almost an hour.

Upstairs of TDH would be Hoofed. Never really went there for dinner before but would be in 2 weeks' time with justin. He bought the GroupOn deal and I kind of self invited since he couldn't find someone else before I sort of offered myself up on a silver platter.

Strange how I couldn't recall the name of this drink until it miraculously popped up in my head. This is midori. Drinking with an Indian guy certainly has its advantages as you'll be drinking more than the usual mojito/tequila sunrise/jaggerbomb/margarita. It wasn't that bitter and does go down smooth. Somewhat.

Some orange juice concoction. Was it with malibu? I think so. Something tropical, slightly milky. Can't remember as this is in mid Nov. Just got around to blogging about it now. Lol.
This was better. Deadlier too and almost no taste of alcohol right until the last note .

By now, I was quite gone. He made me finish all these by myself, only taking a sip or two for testing purpose. If I didn't know better, he was trying to get me drunk. No, getting laid (with each other) wasn't part of the plan. Not mine at least.
This had a rather nice look to it. Taste wise, drunk already la. All taste the same jor.

Coffee liquor. Oh he paid for them all. I'm supposed to buy the next round. Told him to wait until my house purchase is settled. Which is in few months time. Bwahahaha .

Last but not least . It was a good night which may have ended up being more than just drinking. But heck, thank God.

Do I miss being drunk? Hell yea.

el-cheapo wedding

2012-01-25T18:52:00.002+08:00

How close was I to getting hitched? Never quite reached the stage where they even popped the question. Quite sad :( It would be nice to have someone but at 28, it's just one of those things that don't matter anymore.

There was once when I joked with a friend about the sort of wedding we would have. To save on the expenses, just invite the people for an impromptu mamak session. Gather them all around and just announce "hey, we're married. Order whatever you want, it's all on us". Or we could just inform them before hand it'll be a wedding banquet but at a mamak. That should cover the cost by a bit.

Of course, that is quite stingy. So instead of mamak, lets have it at McD instead.

BSOD

2012-01-25T18:39:00.000+08:00

Been awhile since this graced my screen. Be it my desktop (which technically died without so much of a blue screen to pre-empt me on its impending death) or my laptop. The latter happened few times when I first bought it but attributed that to teething issues which turned out to be true as it was smooth sailing after that.

Until recently. It only came up once but did get me slightly worried. I should be backing up my laptop data but my 500GB external hdd is being filled up with the data from my desktop which is slowly (and very slowly I might add) but surely being copied. That there isn't much space left in it. Redundant data exists between my laptop and the desktop but it's probably going to take awhile to sift through them.

Took this picture on my phone and showed it to iMail the next morning:

omfg this is the first time I saw BSOD on an android phone

Like super fail

thought of the day

2012-01-25T18:12:00.002+08:00

For unmarried people in their late 20s or older & spending the festivities with their parents...

Guy: such a filial son. Very good. Husband material
Girl: so pitiful. Still not married & gotta accompany the parents.sure will become a spinster

True/false?

~
This came to mind as I was shopping in Klang Parade with my parents, hunting for my father's pair of pants. Earlier during breakfast with their friends, there were interesting revelations.

so how old are you?

why don't you guess ;)

hmm, at most 25

i'm born in 1983

so that should be still in 20s then

to be more accurate , i am 29 this year.

really....

So they started thinking of who is available to introduce to me etc.
My father was somewhat uninterested, sceptical . Could it be due to the fact the candidate is a chicken rice seller or he didn't want his little girl to leave his side?

face the fact

2012-01-24T23:30:00.002+08:00

I can't do without my long hair. I need it long because it gives me a sort of joy. Something to do. Wait, that doesn't make sense.

ck wonders why I want to keep my hair long as I look better with short hair. True, it makes me look younger, modern. But is that really the sort of look that I would like to portray ? Even now itself , people mistaken me as being in my mid 20s. They don't ask if I am married or dating. The first question would always be:

so you're working now?

Like lol. So what pesky relatives asking when I'm getting married or have a bf. Nada. That just doesn't happen to me. At all!

Review: Chili's, One Utama

2012-01-24T23:24:00.001+08:00

I'm starting to boycott Western/American food because of the other dinner in TGIF. It would have been 3 Western dinner in the span of 1 month. Or two. That's quite a lot. Maybe it's just me. We came here for Justin's farewell and cousin's sau kong chau. The latter turned out to be as a testing water dinner for them to hook me up with their housemate -_- I've met him a couple of times and certainly doesn't fit my criteria oat all of what I look for in a guy.

Hence, no more random hook ups please.

I don't generally get asked out that much for company outings. Come to think of it, nobody even asks me out for lunch. Partly because mine is at noon while theirs are either earlier or after mine.

A very difficult shot. I am still learning the ropes of my camera. Got cw to give it a good cleaning due to my missing lens pen. He came back with this and that suggestions.

Get a new casing for my camera as my current one is a dust and fungus magnet
Lose the dangling charm as it's bound to scratch my camera

Strangely enough, after he was done with it, it started not to detect my SD card that easily. Coincidence?
He himself owns a DSLR , not a camera shop.

Triple play starter - A combo of three favorite starters. Generous portions of our Chicken Crispers® mouth watering , Wings Over Buffalo and Southwestern Eggrolls with sauces for dipping.

The chicken crispers were just so so. A little dry but I suppose that's where the sauces come in.
Not sure what's wrong with my PS as it incorrectly stamped this and it was too late by the time I noticed it.

Love the buffalo wings which were spicy.Quite juicy and tender. Like me ~

The egg roll's been substituted with cheese and green/red bell pepper bruschetta. The bruschetta itself, well, I still prefer the non-cheesy version.

Deep fried calamari rings. Good that it isn't so thick with the dough but the rings themselves were so puny. Reminds me of the Astro Ms Malaysia 2011 beauty pageant I watched this afternoon. The winner was a 22year old lass standing at 170cm weighing at 48kg. I must be borderline obese at 162cm, 55kg. Should be 58kg now from the CNY binge eating.

Bottomless tostada chips. Justin especially liked this. It's different from the usual nachos chips and the chilli sauce is different. Not too spicy but has that raw chilli taste to it.

Firecracker fish fillet - A grilled fish fillet brushed with sweet & spicy glaze and garnished with red chile tapenade & sesame seeds. Served with seasonal veggies & rice on the side.
I have to say that while this isn't that bad, it certainly was a little too bland for my liking. Sure, there's the spices and lemon herb butter on top but the fish itself just lacks that kick.

Oldtimer burger - Mouthwatering burger with mustard, shredded lettuce, tomato, pickle & onion.
The singh ordered this. It looks huge. He became the butt of jokes that night. No pun intended. I never thought that rear entry is actually a form of contraceptive. Or whatever you call it.

South western Quesadillas -Fajita-marinated chicken with grilled onions and Jack cheese in tortillas. Served with sour cream and house-made pico de gallo
I think Justin has a liking for Quesadillas as he ordered it here and during the TGIF dinner too. Not that I have anything against it but I certainly wouldn't be ordering it again and again. We almost had an argument today after reading this list.

i dun think it's a good thing for me to get involved with anyone
no good ever came out of it
nah! i dont believe that to be true
from what i noticed, all relationships that last is very much of give n' take
and applying "friendzone" to another level
like my parents etc...
read this
where do you get these link, like really
why? no good?
this is a motivation page for once
to get on with your life and stop regressing

After awhile, he was saying how I should be applying point# 14 and 13 with regards to relationship. I got tired of explaining why it's a bad idea and if I were to tell him the full picture (which I am not keen to), he'll probably look at me with disdain. Lol. It's not that our friendship is worth that much to keep. It's just not worth the effort of trying to explain.

Threw Point #20 back at him for that. Ah ha!
Oh the Quesadillas was just so so.

Crispy honey chipotle chicken crispers - Strips of chicken hand-battered then breaded and fried to perfection for the extra crispy crunch. Then topped with our spicy & smoky honey-chipotle sauce.
I recommended this to geetha as she was undecided on what to have. It turned out pretty decent, better than what I had previously.

BBQ beef ribs - Beef ribs, mesquite-smoked & "triple-basted" with Chili's BBQ sauce. Served with homestyle fries & sweet corn on the cob.
Chris ordered this . It does seem appropriate . It wasn't that bad but the portion was quite large.
A little on the dry side.

Lamb chop. This was too far for me to sample.

Presidente Margarita - Shake up your day with our distinctive hand-shaken Margarita made with Sauza® Gold Tequila, Cointreau® & Brandy.
The first time I tried this was in Empire Subang on a lazy Sunday afternoon when couzzie asked if I wanted to join him for drinks. It was memorable because I was still with cg that time and had to lie to cg on my whereabouts that day. Had I told him the truth, it'll be more than just a punched door. He did suspect a little when I told him that I was just at home (what can I say, I am an honest woman and very bad at lying) but didn't press on it further. Phew.

While it's deadlier than TGIF's , this version isn't that so deadly like the one I had in Empire. Still packing some alcohol.

Loges ordered this although I don't understand why. Her reason was that she had lunch already. Oh yea, I took my lunch at 3pm instead of the usual 12pm so that I didn't have to eat that much. I wonder why people like to think I'm thin. Reason being, I am not.

Eating what I want, it is difficult as I don't have any diet plan. No exercise plan. My alarm bells start to go off in my head when my rings don't slide off that easily. That's the only sure way to tell. Though sometimes, it could be just the monthly bloating.

Yes, I am well aware of how best to keep fit and my restricted eating isn't the best and so, I wouldn't recommend it to anyone unless if you're born with stomachs of steel and determination of gold. When I don't eat, I tend not to eat at all. When I do, hell gates open.

A second visit here. It almost didn't materialize because I didn't feel like coming here (again) and the way the invitation was forced, well, made me like it's an invitation out of courtesy. It's ok, you don't have to go out of your way to invite me just because we're family/you want something from me/buy favours from me.
Or it could be I'm just overly sensitive.

My cousin made me take this picture to commemorate our sau kong chau dinner. With one hand. Only. -_- Very difficult ok?

We ordered the chicken mushroom soup. This is what came. First. As they were happily munching on the biscuits, elaine wondered why it looked so different from the previous time she tried it.

is it beef?

can't be. we ordered chicken.

sure looks different.

After trying out, they discovered it is beef. Lol.

This is the chicken mushroom soup. Thick with cream, a little too thick as a matter of fact. Still better than those Campbell can soup.

The same tostada chip but this time around, they don't like it :(

Wings over buffalo - Chicken drumettes tossed in our spicy Buffalo wing sauce. Served with Ranch dressing.
For the first time ever, I found someone who actually appreciates celery stick. CheahKor actually finished them off while I finished the chicken because they forgot to take my main order. It's strange because the waiter took our orders and repeated them but didn't punch the order into the kitchen -_-
Thank God the chicken's quite tasty and juicy. Raw spicy. But not too.

The same firecracker fish fillet. This must be their famous dish. It was all just so so. Didn't leave that lasting impression.

If anything the fish tasted quite ordinary. Read somewhere about dory being some local fish breed.
Just a fancy name given to make it look/sound more high class.

Caesar salad without anything but just veggie, crouton and cheese.
Somehow, it is strange that a number of people actually reads this post on how to make crouton. The salad itself wasn't so bad. Dressing was a tad bit rich.

This time around, I managed to try the lamb chop. It was a little too dry, no thanks to the guy who ordered it well cooked -_-

Fire grilled chicken and portobello - Fire grilled chicken breasts with a marinated Portobello mushroom served over zesty peppercorn sauce with loaded mashed potatoes (beef bacon) & seasonal veggies.
Found this a tad bit dry, nothing exciting at all. Somewhat forgettable too

A proper picture of the molten chocolate lava cake. I wasn't sure if I wanted to order this as they were all rather stuffed while I didn't have any main course of my own.

don't worry, just order . if you can't finish, we can help.
sure? i thought you guys are very full already

yea but still want to try ma...

i think you could have cut through all the earlier pretence and say "we want to try it" -_-

They all enjoyed it. So that's good.
Still, not going to Chili's, TGIF for awhile.

make work a better place

2012-01-24T16:40:00.000+08:00

If you spend an average of 9hours a day managing people (read: pulling your hair trying best to make them all productive), this may be a good read. Can't say that I've tested them out from a managerial perspective but from a fellow worker's point of view, they do appear to be rather valid. Though I do have my reservations about it:

Make Rules for the 95%, Not the 5%
This would work if 95% of your work force are those who hard working, motivated, and professional. If it's t the reverse, it will only spell more issues as the majority take advantage of the rules.

Celebrate Going Home Early
I don't typically like to go home early as that is quite when I get the most done. Nobody to bother me. Nobody harass me. Nobody to cross my train of thought. But when I do leave work ~~early~~ on time, they all look surprised that I feel somewhat guilty about it :(

Stop Swearing
My week of no swearing lasted long enough but the bad habit came back after awhile. Another resolution to add: no swearing for 2012. I've been mentally questioning myself, wondering if it would be the best thing to say in any given circumstances. It's been working out so far , avoiding unnecessary conflicts.

Cultivate Experts
I have this idea of making few of my team members to be the SME (subject matter expert) in different topics/systems/applications but that hasn't quite worked out. For one, they do seem to be picking up a little slow. For another, they aren't keen on it at all. Doing what is required of them minimally, never going the extra mile. Are they just complacent of being at the level where they are at, or they not interested to move up further or even just not blessed with the skills to (this one, I could easily deal with given the right training and practise), but it's difficult moulding people into something that they are not. Even worse when they are not keen on it.

Talk About the Future
This was a talk I had with the boss in the last quarter of last year. To date, I still haven't finished the objective he gave me i.e. to finish at least one technical certification. Nor have I even started yet. It's not his fault but my energy level dips so low from the workload. Sorry, must be the age finally catching up on me.

Let Employees Manage Their Own Energy
Working in a call centre, this is a very unlikely suggestion but it was funny when few of my colleagues were given a warning letter for being late for 1-2 mins. Lol. Have I been late? Twice due to my car. Twice due to my alarm dying on me.

Recognize Your Team Every Day
One day while I was on the phone, my boss came over and said "Good job, amy" and walked away, leaving me still on a call, bewildered. He walked over to my team mate's place to repeat the whole process. After my call ended, I asked him what that was about. Apparently it was just a pep talk of good stuff. Like seriously. It's one thing to complement your team but when done in that nonchalant manner, it loses its value.

airing your dirty laundry

2012-01-24T16:17:00.000+08:00

Is not such a good idea.

Maybe I should stop treating my blog here like my personal diary since it is open to all as well. But then again, with the many blogs on the net, it would be akin to finding a needle in the haystack.
Or so I'd like to think.

Wonder how much a search string would need to come up before google actually registers it in their auto complete/suggest. But the fact that I actually exists on the auto complete:

Interesting. Thank you to all the true blue stalkers on /k/ Now, would you start to click on my blog ads?

Somehow, my name is also appearing I do realise that's how some of you actually look up for my blog when you're in the office. Don't la. Go home and stalk me instead. You know just how nsfw my blog can get.

better off dead.

2012-01-24T15:32:00.001+08:00

there are people good as friends but not lovers. there are people good as lovers but not as friends. then, there are people who are, well, better off dead.

and chances are, these people are still alive only because it's illegal to kill them. Or that you can't afford a hitman.

~
Not the most auspicious of manner to kick start the dragon year. But if the first day of the lunar new year is an indication of the year, then it'll be one where not much of hard work will be required from my end yet there'll be abundance of food coming my way. Not required to do much clean up either since someone else would be (I offered, she declined). Though there may be haters (she made me clean though my help was already rejected earlier), it'll be smooth sailing as people will set the record straight without having me to do much of anything.

That, my friend, is the life.
Just live life without expectation, do your part and it will all work out right.

we could be happy

2012-01-24T01:38:00.003+08:00

My very heavily pregnant aunt has been gracing us with her presence for these past 2 days due to the lunar new year along with the rest of the family. Had everything went well, her son (my cousin) would have been born at almost the same time with my baby. But, we all know how that story ended. Being around her made me ~~wish~~ fantasized that I was indeed married and we were celebrating the festivities at his parents place. They weren't all that comfortable and nice around me but at least accommodating and tried to make it comfortable for me.

The perks of having delivered the next kin into the family tree certainly has its perks.
I do not blame them for not being able to fully accept me. Nor do I expect them to but the least would be that they accept the fact that I was a part of their lives now and I wish nothing more than to bring happiness into their lives with a grandchild. A son or a daughter, it just doesn't matter as long as my baby comes into this world alive, healthy and happy. But then that again, we all know how that ended.

There would be the awkward silence around the table as they wonder how best to address the situation but it's all right. I am perfectly accustomed to such moments that it's best they think I am invisible and leave me to my devices. I'm happier in that sense, without people fussing over me, having to scratch their head on how to make me feel at home. Or at least less foreign. But this is again, something that never happened. And never will.

I don't think that they'll be able to come to terms with the fact that I am carrying their grandchild but as the delivery date approaches, they would soon start to look forward to the reality of being grandparents. First timers though his mother would have had experience given years of babysitting them for a living. There will always be a gap between his parents and I but at the end of the day, our child will bring us all together. Not in the most ideal of manners, just enough for the family to sit down without having to hurl abuses at one another.

Our baby. My child. I don't want to be those overly nervous new mothers. I don't want to dote too much on him that he doesn't learn at all. His grandparents would be delighted with his presence in the family but wouldn't show it too much. Or at least not in front of me. But , it's all right. As long as they are happy with him, I am happy too. We'll gather for the odd family reunions with the almost awkward, unnatural smiles but they'll be beaming looking at their first grandchild. Pretending for a second there that I was just another addition into the family.

Minus the drama. Minus the adultery. Minus the sin.

As I prepare for bed time in the bathroom, casually looking at my face as I brush my teeth, I wonder nonchalantly if he is taking care of the baby. Just then, he steps into the bath room looking at me, looking at him. Who's looking after the baby if we're both here? I asked.

he's asleep in the cot. he'll manage alone for awhile.

A little relaxed but still thoughts of sudden infant death syndrome still played in my head that I hurriedly finished to go look at our baby. We never talked about how much he takes on him or me. It was our baby.

That was all that mattered.

parting is such sweet sorrow

2012-01-24T01:38:00.002+08:00

And I wanted Henry to be in this child, so that when he was gone, he wouldn't be entirely gone, there would be a bit of him with me.

Taken from The Time Traveller's Wife, just realised that I haven't done a review on that book yet. Maybe some other time. For now, I just want to talk, or rather, write about keeping something when it is gone.

It reminded me of the times when I held on steadfastly but to no avail to things that eventually slipped out of my hand. Literally. The keys were these. There aren't any mementoes that are worth discarding. Except for the Penang hotel online payment slip saved on my desktop which I intended to use for blackmailing purpose but that's probably rendered useless now. Or the medical result sheet which is kept in my miscellaneous drawer.

Each time when I look at them (which isn't often until lately), it makes me sad.
The sheet especially broke me down as I was looking for my camera lens pen (which sadly is still no where to be found, boo hoo).

The memories that are attached to them hurts . Not as much as it did but still just as raw. Still, I won't throw them away. Until it fades away, maybe then.

The ink . The memories. The feelings.

feed me

2012-01-24T00:32:00.004+08:00

I love surprises. But nobody gives them to me now. Not anymore. Not good surprises at least. Lousy surprises maybe. Once in a while, there's the nice surprise (the perks of working on site) though it may not always be something that you like. Better something than nothing.

After much contemplation, I returned the chocolate to couzzie.

why? got something wrong with the chocolate?

no ah.

then why you return? if got poison, i need to tell the shop

-_- i haven't even opened it yet.

So, no Christmas present. Or birthday. Or new year.
He told me no CNY red packet either.

And I thought we were family
Guess I thought wrong. Like always

for all the things you wanted

2012-01-24T00:17:00.002+08:00

I've bought a number of deals off GroupOn and most of them are for stuff that are convenient and interesting.

Bought twice for Bobalicious as it was his favourite drink. Or he seemed to like it a fair bit. Not sure if he has used the second coupon as he didn't mention anything about it. Didn't even thank me but it's ok. He could just throw it out the window. Probably doesn't like it anymore. Or anything from me. Expiring in 1 more day anyway.

The haircut that I had recently was also from this. Never been to that saloon before. Never even heard of it before. Only knew that it was near home and the deal was pretty affordable so what the heck. My hair was in desperate need for a trim too.

My first virgin mani/pedicure was bought by my sister. Can't find the link for it but it was also from GroupOn. Would have been the worst deal I've had but I shall refrain from any further comment because after the session, we left for dinner nearby with the family. It was until after dinner that I realised that I left my rings there. Frantically rushed to the place to discover that they were closed. Had to ring them few times on the mobile line before they picked up.

Even so, she actually left my rings right where I left them instead of keeping it safely -_- That would have been the most expensive manicure/pedicure. Ever. In the history of amy yee. And most probably the only one if I didn't get them back as it would only remind me of them and I'd be bloody pissed off with myself for being that forgetful, negligent.

Even so, something caught my eye today. I've never had a proper breast examination all the while (doubt being groped in the name of foreplay would count as one). This may be a good thing. But after the last deal, I'm somewhat weary about it. Also, thinking of going to my panel clinic to issue a referral letter then go to the hospital to get my follow up and maybe get the breast examination too? Kill two birds with one stone. Or kill one stone, one boobies check with one visit.

Thinking of heading to Tropicana Medical Centre because it sounds more classy (hey, it's Tropicana, don't play play). Doesn't look like there'll be parking problem like Kelana Jaya Medical Centre or the Damansara Specialist Centre.

Any other suggestions? Must be in AIA list of hospital though.

a lost cause

2012-01-23T23:56:00.000+08:00

The first pap smear I did was way back in 2007 or so. Nothing much came out of that except that the procedure itself may be a slight bit uncomfortable for first timers but doesn't hurt that much. Looking back at the post, it's surprisingly how much stronger, more resilient I have grown. Perhaps that or I have given up hope/reason that there will be someone there for me anymore.

It's not that sad or pathetic of a prospect once the reality sinks in. The thought of not being disappointed at the end of the day far outweighs the pathetic notion of it. To this day, I still don't quite understand why teddy was so pissed about me not telling him about my father's condition. What could telling him have done? I understood perfectly well that he couldn't be there even if he wanted to . That was my defence mechanism. Had I told him, I would have expected him to be there and try to make things better.
Not the overall bigger picture better but his presence there would have helped.

There had been a number of times in my life that I wish I didn't have to go through it alone. But after awhile, you ask yourself, "Really? After the last time, what makes you think that this time will be any different? What makes you think for a second that your life will turn around and you will finally get what you want?" . So I stopped. It's not about being pessimistic or realistic. It is easy for people, outsiders to put a label on things that they don't feel firsthand, that they don't have to deal with after they left the conversation.

I am the one who has to pick up the pieces of your deluded argument.
I am the one who has to continue living in this your-definition-of-pathetic life.
You really shouldn't pass judgement or make an opinion of another person's life. Especially if it would scar them for the rest of it.

So don't tell me if I'm thin. Or if I'm getting fat. Or if I'm lonely. Or if I'm pathetic.
I'm ok the way I am. I am just not ok with people labelling my life and hinting how my life shouldn't be , as it is.

My life is mine to lead. Mine to destroy. Not for you to criticize.

random thought of the day

2012-01-23T01:13:00.004+08:00

if sweet sweet god loves you so then i'll make you worthy of His love .

the evil in us

2012-01-23T01:12:00.001+08:00

you think the devil is responsible?
people is evil, mr constantine. People.
we're born capable of terrible things then sometimes, something else comes along and gives us just the right nudge

A lot of times, a lot of things run through my head.
Most of them are things which I ordinarily wouldn't do or even think of. In line with my 'do no evil' principle. But then, there are times when things, people beg for you to be evil.

The situation just calls for it.

home made steamboat

2012-01-23T00:42:00.001+08:00

My second visit elaine's house for home cooked dinner. Or is it the third? This time around, we were having steamboat. It's nice to have people cook for you. It's nice to come home to a warm meal :) It's nice to have just have a home to come home to.

Since she and her husband weren't working, they got the food for dinner that night while I got the slices of pork. Love the abalone mushroom, the only other type of fungi that I like.

Lots of food. But we managed to finish them. This time around, her brother, loon joined us as well. It was a merry happy dinner of the cousins. Talking to couzzie today, it made me feel how small my family is. His family has decided not to have anymore home cooked reunion dinner as it was too much of a hassle.

how many ?

2.5 table.

My family could barely fit 1 table. How is it that we are of the same Yee yet so different in numbers? Nvm, come Feb/Mar 2012, we shall have another addition to the family

Please gaze at the glorious meat. Sliced so thinly that you can just swish swash them into the boiling pot of soup and eat it, like sukiyaki beef. Om nom nom. Don't be deceived. There are actually quite a lot of it here . So thin, so good.

Home made oyster sauce and oil mixture for the wantan noodle. Elaine's more blessed than I am in the cooking dept. Being a mother, she hasn't lost that much of punk.

Deep fried shallots and kick arse chilli. Must have for steamboat.

Since her husband didn't know how to read chinese, he bought a packet of herbal soup home only for elaine to translate it as "bah kut teh". Thankfully, they went out to get a proper herbal soup packet instead. It was a rather good dinner. I think I need to mix with more people of my age and race more. Starting to lose touch with my roots.

So can bring me some love letters?

if there is any at home.

why not? i thought chinese people like to sit down together by the coal stove and make them?

-_- you're talking about the same generation of chinese people who still wear cheongsam?

uh huk... i guess

we don't do that anymore.

so sad. you're losing your culture, traditions.

just because we don't do that, doesn't mean we are forgetting our cultures ok. it's like intelligence, just because we have it , we don't need to show it off.

That sort of pissed him off as he asked me to 'talk to the hand'.

Been awhile since I went out to buy ice cream specifically. The new range of Magnum promises sheer luxury with the chocolate truffle, almond types among others. Not really sure because I don't really go out of my way to buy ice cream. Not at all. I've never bought a tub of ice cream in my entire life. Never pigged out with a tub of ice cream sobbing in front of the idiot box watching some romantic comedy. Never binged on ice cream with a gf bitching about the asshole who broke my heart.

None of my heartaches were cured with the aid of ice cream.
If anything, I understand how truly fattening and destructive they are that I limit their presence in my life.

Strangely enough after this post, as we were walking past McD...

do you want ice cream?

umm... er... um... i'm already having pop corn now and will be having dinner later

ok lets go

but ... do you want? :D

=_=

We ended up getting McD sundae cone.

That awesome time

2012-01-22T23:15:00.001+08:00

After a shower, lay down on your bed under the spinning fan stark naked, spread your limbs wide open and let it all air dry naturally.

Review: Italiannies, The Curve

2012-01-22T18:31:00.000+08:00

A last minute shopping invitation led to dinner here.Been awhile since I've been to Italiannies for dinner. Partly because the last guy I dated thinks he can cook better than them (ok, his cooking skill isn't that bad, definitely better than mine). Then I ran out of people to ask out. Then I ran out of time. Then I ran out of reason.

This is what I miss most. Something that I could just as easily make at home =|

Minus the warm bread.

Pepperoni pizza. Fairly thin crust without too much of tomato sauce, if only it had more cheese. Otherwise, good stuff.

Shrimp linguine. We all enjoyed this as the sauce was just right. Big juicy shrimps. Love the bits of tomato.

My first time trying out risotto. This is the seafood version. It's definitely sticky, almost starchy consistency but not quite. Love the abundance of seafood in it. But I think it would need a bit more of citrus flavour to mask out the fishiness of the seafood.

a woman's best friend

2012-01-22T17:13:00.002+08:00

When you're at that stage of past biological clock ticking with no suitors in sight, a cat would seem the next plausible choice. Unless if you are already a cat lover , then maybe hamsters?

For the past year or so, I have been contemplating of getting a pet. Possibly a cat but thought hamsters are smaller thus easier to manager. Didn't get either. Instead, I bought a house -_-

This is christine's cat, baby. Fairly unimaginative name for a cat but she is quite sweet. Rescued from an accident, she has had it for few years. Walks with a slight limp as her front right leg is broken. Very bushy and furry, it's amazing how she doesn't seem to shed that much.

Do I still want to get a cat?
No, think I'll just start to cook more.

the dissolution of a harem

2012-01-22T16:45:00.003+08:00

Not quite a harem but I'd imagine it to be. They are the few who I could easily hang out with and work at the same time. Quite an amazing feat tbh. That's a story of the past now that they have left for greener pastures.

I'm sure that they are at a better place now. Better job, better pay, better company.
Otherwise, why would you leave then?

Ok, so I did leave once because I couldn't stand working with teddy. And smelling like smoke at the end of the day. Like literally.

Is it that cold? Yes, at times.
One of those rare occasions where I am looking decent and prim and proper.

the gift of two

2012-01-22T16:22:00.000+08:00

It's good when people's birthday falls in December. Then you can chalk up some lame excuse about it instead of having to admit that you are really dirt poor to afford 2 gifts i.e. birthday and Christmas. Sorry, you can't do it for my birthday. Nov 16th is hell lot far away from Christmas.

Given how lousy I am with gifts, it was with luck that I found something which pleased me to no ends.
Partly because it was something I was sure he would have a use for. Partly because he lost it.
Of all the things he had lost because of me (directly and indirectly), this is one that I could very well replace.
As for the non-tangibles, lets all leave it in God's hands.

Because he didn't want me to interfere with it.

It didn't come with a box so I had to make do with what I had in my room then. It was hilarious to see the look on his face when he unwrapped it. Like "wtf you giving me this for?" Eh recycle please. Don't expect me to go buy a nice and proper box just for you to throw away at the end of it.

This is how it was properly wrapped in. There was once I went overboard and wrapped it with like 100 pieces of newspaper. Over zealous. It was just a box of chocolate. The thing that I like most about giving gifts is how people like it, appreciate it. Hence, it's not something that I would casually get unless if I knew for certain that the receiving party would really like it.
Also another reason why I prefer cold hard cash for gifts.

The end product. With a cute finishing touch. It's the same ribbon that I've been using for his past few gifts. Rofl. It's not that I am that el-cheapo (I have like a rim of them?), just that why waste it? It's still perfectly usable.

This is what I got him. Technically , he had the same pair of cuffs but maybe in a smaller size before. After dinner while walking back to his car, his hand accidentally lost the grip or he forgot he had them in his palms that they dropped out into the drain. Just like my life. It went clink clonk then plomp into the dirty murky water. Had they dropped onto the sides of the drain instead of into the actual water, he would have removed the drain steel cover/cage and went down there to pick it up himself -_- Mind you, it wasn't those feet tall drain but the kind that you would need to climb down to. Just a step or two down and you could fit in there. Not those monsoon drain la.

Not sure if they were that precious to him that he'd thought of it or because if they were a little costly to begin with or had some sentimental value (I'd do stupid random crap shit like that too for things for sentimentality sake). Imagine his surprise when he opened up the box to reveal these darlings. He thought I actually went back there and probably got some bangla to get them back . As much as I have sacrificed for you, darling, that is quite borderline insane. Hunting them for you in the shop is way easier fyi.

Don't know if he likes them or not because I've not seen him worn them before. But I really do like them ^_^ He said that he likes them but oh well, you know men.

Perhaps I should get a guy's shirt and a pair of cuffs for myself too for that androgynous look.

If you asked

2012-01-22T15:21:00.001+08:00

Q: will you marry me?

A: probably yes.

~ taken from the movie, The Switch. Giving hope to guys who are stuck in the friend zone. It made me think that I can manage being a single mother too.

Any sperm donor?

very rare picture

2012-01-21T23:37:00.000+08:00

Because someone else took it. It was after a dinner in The Curve. Undecided on what to do, we roam the streets in search of that elusive high. Lol. Ended up at some drinking joint with decent music. Just the three of us. When was the last time I did that? Don't think I ever did before. It's always in 2 or more.
I particularly like this picture because they were up the stairs before she asked me to stop for her to take a picture. The peace sign is the best pose I could come up with on such short notice.

When it was just the few of us left behind. In a way, they are perhaps what's left of my little clique since justin and iMail left in December. Do I look forward to building a new ~~harem~~ circle of friends? Whatever happens happens. To be honest, even if I wanted to, there just isn't any time left to build new bridges. Busy maintaining what's left. Busy picking up the debris from the last heart break. Busy reclaiming my me time.

My current friendships satisfy me enough that they don't leave much of a void in me.
Not anymore. Or have I grown complacent? Easily satisfied?

Another picture that turned out better than expected. Looking at it, I miss my hair. Never realised it was that long. Makes me miss it even more. Only time. Just like how time will heal a broken heart. It will also grow my hair too.

Time.

Fixation

2012-01-21T19:12:00.001+08:00

The house bunny...

Her flat tummy... Her cute belly button.

Yummy.

it's ok

2012-01-21T02:13:00.001+08:00

I haven't finished reading this list yet but it makes senses.
2am. Should go to bed.

the people who see me more than my own family

2012-01-21T02:06:00.001+08:00

Colleagues though anyone would probably see me more than my family. I'm not particularly close to them. The older I get, the more I find myself to grow and become a spitting image of what I don't want to that I close myself up and become a recluse, ashamed at what I have become.

It's just that the harder I try not to be, the more I find myself turning into that. Is it in my pointless pursuit of avoiding the imminent that it only accelerated my growth even more? When I stop being around people, being such a pain, it makes me feel somewhat better, knowing that I am not on a destructive path. Well, still am albeit a destruction of a different kind.

My very own self.
Here are the pictures from the dinner. Something not edible for once. Well, kinda.

My previous neighbour. He is perhaps the one guy who managed to sit beside me and stand my attitude and we somewhat enjoy each other's company, having been out for dinners few times. Even couzzie is surprised that we got along. Or rather, he could tolerate me. Lol.
Oh and look at my long legs. :D

My henchman. Or former. One that I could count on for an intelligent conversation though his religious tendencies, over optimism does tick me off at times. Perhaps the one true friend that I have from the office that I still do keep in touch and don't mind to.

Please meet geetha. Still single. And very much available. She makes sandwiches the night before and sells them at work. Pretty damn good business. If only I could have that sort of stamina. Motivation too. I particularly like this picture because my hair is so darn straight. Sometimes, people forget that I am a Chinese that they go "omg amy, you look so like a Chinese girl" like wtf? I think I'm mixing with the Indians, Malays, basically the non-Chinese a wee bit too much. Where do I find my own countryman now?

A sure way of telling if yours truly is getting there (i.e. high/drunk): starting to go all lesbo. History speaks for itself.
Being in a team of about 30 with not even 10 of them female, we strangely bond. Not very close but she isn't someone that I would ordinarily be friends with under ordinary circumstances. We all need to find our allies as best we can given our limited resources.

Yes, my fingers are scary. Someone actually noticed my ring on my right ring finger and wondered if it meant that I was married. My Tiffany & Co ring is on it while my diamond ring is on my left middle finger. Does that mean I am married or single? Really depends on who's asking. If it's a smart + rich +handsome (or dying) guy, the status is very much single. Even if not, that could be easily rectified. If you don't have any of those criteria, yes, I'm the missus.
After tonight, I hope nobody tries to hook me up with any guy anymore. It's somewhat embarrassing and awkward when you don't know how to reject him politely without offending the mutual friend and the guy himself. And me being me, they are planning for another group outing which is fine by me, unless if he is thinking it'll lead he and I somewhere. How to deal with that?

A number of people were shocked by the amount on the receipt. That is actually just the food and drinks but not inclusive of the other 3 bottles of white wine he got which I would happily like to claim half (if not , one) bottle of. Chardonnay, not my favourite but still bearable. It wasn't too smooth.

boss, why you no get riestling?

ok, since you arranged this, you can have it.

hmm.... (looks left and right)... should i? there aren't many of us left

i was referring to one glass.

Kill joy.

The girls are a closer clique which I am not a part of nor interested to be and am happy for it to be that way. It's a great thing that there is like a fine line. Enough for them to know me on the surface , touching it, barely scraping through, without encroaching into my space. Strange for someone who is quite a blank at work,secretive would have a blog for the entire world to see.
How does that work out? Well, The idea of filtering my face out just so people won't know is quite a dumb one. Makes me look like some prisoner. Or pictures of those convicted criminals photographed on the newspaper but they have to blackout the eyes to protect their identity.

One of my favourite new girl because she picks up quite fast, asks the right question, understands pretty well. With some people, I could be asking why and they would be answering how. It always makes me cry and sometimes I understand why people are so reluctant to call tech support. I feel you too.

My attempt at an artsy shot which only the boss understood. Oh well, as long as someone got it, I am pleased.

We have this joke about 18/25/30/100.
He was dating few girls at that number of age except for the 100 which I came up with . How do you guys manage to find dates with a snap of your finger? I can barely find any. After we snapped this picture, I joked that this picture is so going to make his potential gfs misunderstand to which he nervously laughed.

As if repaying the favour, this was his revenge. The photographer was giving the wtf look while taking the picture . No, no. He's not my bf! Come back! I swear to God.

My comrade at work. In a way, we work pretty well with one another and comfortable with the system that has been setup. We have the same issue with the other team mate and there just doesn't seem to be a way about it.

Tell me how do you get someone to save a ticket into their own personal queue when they are working on it. It's frigging annoying when you call the user and they say "Oh, someone's already called me for that" -__- Yes, I talked to the higher ups before that it almost made me cry. Lesson to be learnt: It's important to know which shoe to polish and arse to kiss . Make sure it's the one that will go up.

When I requested for this picture to be taken, the photographer was surprised. No, shocked was more like it. Our strained work relationship is rather well known in the team that my TLs try not to let us have as much contact as possible. Actually, they try to limit the amount of exposure I have to avoid/limit the possible damage onto the other party.

Yea, that's the sort of effect I have on people.

One of the pioneer members of the team. I was one too though I left half way through for another project before returning to what may be the best job I have. So far.
Lets face it, a call centre/service desk isn't everyone's cup of tea. You may think that it's an SPM holder who can't get a decent job that would be working in the industry. Far from it. Sad to say that in Malaysia, this is what the service industry has become. Had a rather interesting chat with a HR guy about the deplorable state of the call centre industry locally where abroad , service desk personnels are more professional.

What's worse is how we are now bringing in foreign workers into the local industry. It's no longer just your maids, constructions workers, now even IT. Soon enough, they'll be outsourcing it to some other cheaper countries. India's already coming off tops but honestly, they need to work on their accent. China's starting to pick up . Can't say that I have spoken to them enough but of the few times I did, it had that distinctive Chinese accent.

Do I have any accent? Perhaps I'll do a video post and you tell me yourself.

The man of the night. I think he was pretty pleased with the turn out for the night. We all enjoyed ourselves and it was great to know him outside of work.

My twin brother. We are as different as day and night. Not in just the skin colour but attitude as well. He has that charisma in him that people feel a sort of friendliness whereas with me, lets just say they don't nick name me ice queen, the bitch for no reason.

While looking for some of the posts , I stumbled on a post about my legendary disappearing act. Now that there isn't anyone who'd give a damn if I'd disappear from the face of earth (bank, lawyers and the lot don't count), sure I do miss it. But it's no biggie especially now when so much is going on in my life.

And I miss the way I write. While my pictures have gotten somewhat better, the quality of my writing has deteriorated over the years. Somehow, I don't suppose you'd like me going all too heavy and drama on this space. Blog hits seem to drop during my dramatic episodes. Come on, a true blue stalker stalks regardless of what. Remember to hit on the ads too .

the imminent.

2012-01-21T00:11:00.002+08:00

i think this is an issue with IE8/Office 2010

yes

Will you fix this issue

i would if i could

~
For some odd reason, it wouldn't send the last message. Maybe for a very good reason too?
Sometimes people think we are god.
Tech support != God.

thought of the day

2012-01-20T09:36:00.000+08:00

don't be sad because of people - they will all die.

of faith and religion

2012-01-19T23:51:00.000+08:00

I have nothing against religion. Or God. Or destiny. Sure, they sometimes get on my nerve especially when they decided one fine day over a drunken session to get together and make my life miserable but no, they aren't in my particular hate list. It's difficult hating them. Though, it is difficult to hate anyone. It has always been my motto to live and let die. Or at least live and not harbour ill thoughts/intentions towards another.

Anyway, God itself is good. God is almighty. God is, well, omnipresent.
It's God's people, or the so-called believers that I can't stand. Which God would actually want you to murder another person who happen not to believe in Him? Which God would tell a man to stone his wife for adultery or chop a criminal's hands off for stealing? That is as far as my mind could recall of the silly, sad interpretations of God that religion has in some parts of the world. Not saying who, not saying what. Just saying.

A statement that I read while searching for a poem:

Science flies you to the moon. Religion flies you into buildings

I almost LOL-ed in the office reading it as it was so true. It's sad that religion sees science as a blasphemy, sacrilegious because it defies the teaching of God. Or man's interpretation of it. Wouldn't it make the world a better place if God and Science worked together, hand in hand for the better of humanity? Oh, such dreams. A very elusive one I might add.

Then, there are also those fanatics who thanks God when things go wrong. Thank God when things go wrong too. Like seriously? Here's to better illustrate the point:

Happy that your God worked things out for you.
Happy that your God gives you challenges to make you stronger.

Seriously, happy for you dude.
But , do you need to push your happiness with God onto my news feed?
Too bad if God decided to take an absence of leave in your life today and let it get out of hand . But hey, God is watching you and will reward you handsomely when you get past it. If it's nothing solid, nothing thought provoking, keep your religion in your heart and mind rightfully where it belongs to.

Not on your fb wall.
If I was your God, I'd be royally pissed that you are using my name to appear all holy and shit.

on an easy cruise

2012-01-19T23:37:00.001+08:00

How is it possible for the road to Tropicana to be still jammed at 8pm on a Thursday? Just how, it eludes me. People, no point doing the last minute CNY shopping. The stuff will still be there even after that. Please don't be such a pain by rushing into the mall. 1Utama to be specific. Although the economy is recovering, it is no excuse to go buy ALL the stuff. Seriously, wtf?

Heard this song on BFM. I like their indie, non commercial songs.

Hey Vitamin K,
Do you even remember my name?
As fragments of the past come tumbling sharply now into focus,
Like a big red typhoon,
And gallons and litres of shame,
Waterfall from heights unknown in the universe,
What matters is what happened to you my love,
For you my love.
I wrote this song to save myself,
And now I sing it because I'm saved,
Because she said goodbye,
So long it's time to die.

here pussy pussy

2012-01-19T23:33:00.002+08:00

Even if you don't like the song, the first 20secs were just boobies galore. It made me go:

Booooooobies. So round. So full. So hard core.

drink up

2012-01-19T23:21:00.001+08:00

Oh my, oh my.
It's strange that just 1year shy of 30, I decided it's high time to spoil my lungs and liver rotten with smoking and alcohol. They all tell me that second hand smoking don't count as true smoking :( Such kill joy.

But at least, my liver is working up a sweat, slowly bleeding to death along with my ovaries (possibly) and (most definitely) my heart (don't think it exists anymore, fml). Wonder if I would live long enough to be able to try them all.

thought of the day

2012-01-19T10:15:00.002+08:00

Losers have goals, Winners have systems.

next question please

2012-01-18T23:38:00.001+08:00

do you have any cigarette?

are you doing some charity work to be still here after your shift?

are you dating anyone?

do you want to work in this account? (where my ex is working in)

There are questions which shouldn't be asked.
Stop wasting my time and yours.

come rain or shine

2012-01-18T23:22:00.002+08:00

My love would never change.

It had been raining so much in December that I was beginning to miss the sun. If you know me well enough, that would be an utter shock as I am always all gloom and cloudy. To miss the sun would be a new high for me.

It was sad each night when I look at my phone screen and all I see is just clouds, rain, clouds and more rain.

been raining quite often lately.

yea. wonder when it'll stop.

should be sometime next week.

huh?and how would you know?

so says here on my phone

Yes, he did give me the wtf look.
But it was rather accurate as it had been sunny since the new year and probably would until after the lunar new year.

9am on the 10th of Jan. So many zeros. When can I turn into a hero? If not, can I be your heroin and make you high to last a lifetime or what's left of it?
If only it'll continue with such cloudy weather because the heat is melting me in ways more than one

busy as a bee

2012-01-18T23:13:00.001+08:00

True enough, whoever said year ends are a relaxing time should be shot in the head. It's anything but relaxing. If anything, it did feel like there were more work. Whatever happened to people going on long Christmas break? Or going on a holiday with the family? No. No such thing.

I am still enslaved to my job.
This started way back in November 2011.

This is my work calendar. Called Good Messaging or Good for Enterprise, it's a rather handy application for those without Blackberry but still want to receive work/corporate email on the go.

Although Blackberry is fast penetrating into the lives of the average consumer (every other person on the street is using a BB , mainly for the BBM function), I still find it a little too corporate for my liking. Hence, it was good that they came up with this nifty app to receive emails, check my calendar.

The month of Nov 2011 had been a particularly taxing one. The blue lines denote appointments. The closer they are, the shorter interval in between. I usually avoid having too many appointments in one day but obviously, a lot of shit happened in Nov 2011.

So how did December 2011 fare then after such a hectic November? Slightly better but not that much. If not because I was away smack in the middle of the month, it would have been just as filled up.

Maybe that's why the second week of Dec was like a cramming session with all my appointments lumped in together. I find it hard to tell them no, pick another date/time because they probably would have picked the best time to their convenience. And being the tech support, I find it somewhat inappropriate to ask to reschedule so I just go along with it.

Do any of you tech support have that issue too or is it just me? =\

This would be my personal calendar. Quite as bad. Except for that 30th Dec, there was no team dinner.
Everything else were just solid booked.

Looking at my calendars alone is sometimes enough to tire me even if the dates have yet to arrive. Or have long gone and I wonder to myself, "When is this going to stop? I need some me time" Wish at times that I could run away and just hide from the world.

January 2012 is turning out to be just as much as a bummer except that weekends are totally free. Apart from the occasional Sunday breakfast with the family, they are all mine to waste. And waste them I did. Sleep till noon on Saturday afternoon. Wake up for few hours to run some errands, eat, watch some series. Continue sleeping/napping depending on how you look at it. Usually lasts for few hours. Wake up just in time for dinner. Which calls for another few more hours of being awake before I knock off again in few more hours time.

There were Saturdays when I would be awake for less than 10hours and I'm sure it's unhealthy but that is how I repay my weekday sleep debt. Come to think of it, it all started when I was getting depressed about having nothing to do during the weekends that sleep was a good alternative. So much so that it's probably the only thing I ever do. It makes me forget of my loneliness, depression. By the time the realization hit me that I was alone yet again, fatigue would have set in yet again and off I go to lala land.

In a way, that is quite a win-win situation. To quote:

Sleep erases all differences: now and then; dead and living.

It may be an utter waste of time to you but if it lets me escape from the loneliness, that's a really good bargain there.
And the fact that I can't spend too much time with someone makes it even more the only option available to moi.

the right to be wrong

2012-01-18T22:45:00.000+08:00

I hate it when people argue with me. Especially those who like to question of my better judgement, opinion. If it's one of my Level1 team, patience would dictate a proper answer, persevering to educate them to ensure that they understand the concept. If it's one of those days where the coffee machine isn't working (mainly Mondays) or there is just too much on my plate (and it's not food that I am referring to here), my usual response would be to repeat the same answer.

Sometimes to the point of copy pasting the same thing.
Sorry but lazy is lazy.
You ask the same thing. The answer will remain the same too.

The issue is when it happens to be someone above. After reading this article, I realised how wrong my strategy was. It's not that I do all the wrong things but there are somethings I could do differently, better.

My consolation would be the fact that they say yes/no to my salary. It's their show. Let them run it the way they want. Thus instead of giving them this look upfront:

Just do as the man says.
And when it's over, gracefully smile and go:

the friendzone song.

2012-01-18T22:36:00.005+08:00

Toxic Girl...

I'm sure we all know one in my life. I wonder if I am to any of my friends ...

In the sky the birds are pulling rain,
in your life a curse has got a name,
makes you lie awake all through the night
that's why.
She's intoxicated by herself,
everyday she's seen with someone else,
and every night she kisses someone new
never you.

You're waiting in the shadows for a chance
because you believe at heart, that if you can,
show to her what love is all about
she'll change.
She'll talk to you with no one else around,
but only if you're able to entertain her,
the moment conversation stops she's gone again.

priceless/speechless

2012-01-17T23:56:00.000+08:00

The realization that I am 29 this year.
Goodness gracious, just when I am accustomed to the reality that I have turned 28, I am slapped in the face with the fact that I am just 1year shy from hitting the big 3-0.

On a plus note, few people have been misguessing my age to be below 25. Woo hoo

so how old are you?

why don't you guess

hmm, 22?

nope.

25?

rofl.... guess again.

-_- what? 30?

2years to go . (I was still stuck in 2011 but this conversation took place less than a week ago).

omfg.

And it dawned on me while ~~driving~~ getting stuck on the Sprint highway back home at 8.30pm (wtf jam?), I am a milf! Nvm if it's a self declared. If some people can self declare that they are good in bed just because their gf and exes didn't complain about their performance *cough I'd know better why not cough*, I know you'd like to get laid with me. Even if I didn't/don't fully fulfill the m part of the milf, still am!

Review: TGIF, 1Utama

2012-01-17T23:46:00.000+08:00

I was tasked with organizing the team dinner because I asked for it. Me and my big mouth. The first place that I had in mine was Fatty Crab because I've never been there before. But because they were so damn lansi and don't accept reservation even for 30pax, it was Chilli's which was in the mall. Too bad, they could try to accept a reservation but wasn't optimistic that they could sit all of us -_- Truthfully, 30pax was just my estimate. I have nfi how many in total there are in my team :D After much consideration, I picked this place as it was in the mall, we could all walk over without the hassle of having to find transportation , the place , parking etc. And they gamely accepted my reservation. Nice!

This place was the last in my list because I've been to the one in The Curve and SS14 (which should have been closed by now I believe) and they've always been the same. It's not that the place is bad, they just don't change. Same ol' boring menu. But, oh well, at least they could fit us all and didn't make it difficult to get tables. After Chilli's threw that ultimatum to me, I honestly was ready to give up and cry It's just that at the first sign of failure, I would like to bail out before it dies out on me. Pretty much like how my relationships are dealt with .

Margarita shaker. I don't know what's geetha's obsession with shaken margarita. She ordered the same thing in Chilli's for justin's farewell too. This wasn't that potent. I was tempted to order one for myself but took pity on the boss after my ATL was going around, making sure that people's drink are never empty, or keeping goldfish.

Parmesan-Crusted Chicken Quesadillas. The tortilla was a little too thick though the filling was pretty generous with slabs of chicken, tomato and cheese. Not oozing with melting cheese but still a decent offering.

Deep fried mac&cheese. It's a funny thing because when I started to organize this particular team dinner, I asked around for suggestions, anywhere that could fit us all with a budget of RM40/pax. After the date and venue were confirmed, one of them came up to me sheepishly and asked ...

so amy, the team dinner's this friday right?

yeap, you coming?

yea.

cool. I'll mark you as coming then.

oh btw....

yea?

it's RM40 right.

yeap.

so....

so......?
how do I pay you?

It took me awhile to figure out that they thought my RM40/pax was like an entrance fee for the team dinner. When I told him that it was just a budget to give them ideas on where to have it, he sighed in relief.

but, some of them didn't want to go as they thought they had to pay.

well, they should have clarified with me first. let them continue to think that way then.

Seriously, I understand if you don't like to talk to me at work about work but heck, it's not my fault if you make that sort of assumption then make the decision not to join the dinner. The other reason being the guest list was fast approaching the 30 headcount I allocated for. When I told my boss about the misunderstanding, he actually went

But oh well, I didn't want the team to hate me anymore than they already do so no, I didn't collect the money from them.

A cross section of the mac&cheese. Sorry but it looks quite hideous. Doesn't taste like it look but still , quite crappy to be honest ;D And it is not melting or oozing with the cheese like their website shows.

Boneless wings. I recall fond memories of this being spicy and succulent. It did turn out to be still spicy though not so succulent as they used the breast meat. The rough meat. But it sort of goes with the overall taste of it. Unsurprisingly, nobody touched the celery.

Tennessee Burger. The boss and dee both ordered this. While the boss happily wolfed his down minus the fries which was donated to justin on his right, dee couldn't finish hers.

Tennessee Chicken. ranjeeta liked this. I didn't try it but coming to TGIF and ordering chicken just didn't seem right.

Almond Crusted Chicken Salad. Another doink. He ordered this because he ate something before but looking at the portion, are you f-ing kidding me? That's still pretty large. But, at least, it's the healthier of all the other selection, given the copious amount of beer drunk later that night.

Chicken and Shrimp Diablo. It's basically chicken and shrimp pasta in a spicy tomato Diablo sauce. Wtf is a diablo sauce, I have nfi either.
But , I don't think it was that good since the guy who ordered it couldn't finish it and passed it on to hermione to do the honours. But then again, hermione was just literally going around from table to table finishing up people's food -_-
no, like seriously. He was. We just went " o.O dude, you just ate from there". It's not that we are that particular about sharing our food , but the fact he had been ~~table~~ plate hopping was a little worrying. Like he had a blackhole in him.

Chicken with Peppers and Mushrooms.

Chicken caesar salad.

Grilled lamb chops. This is way over the RM40/pax but they still ordered. Sigh. Thankfully, the boss didn't make too much of a fuss for it except for the obligatory /facepalm. Thank you, boss Sorry that they probably misunderstood that it's in AUD/USD/Pound and not MYR.

A better looking chicken and shrimp diablo pasta. I'm officially sworn off pasta at TGIF.

Fish and chips. Can't go wrong right?

Key West Whitefish
Someone told me that dory is just a fancy name given to the local fish . Can't remember which. Oh my lousy memory.

Beef Bacon Cheeseburger. Mine! Love the juicy patty with crispy bacon on top. This was about RM 24. My boneless wings were about RM14. Total was still below RM40. Well, the budget is actually inclusive of drinks but since everyone was already drinking beer (not just one round btw), I might as well maximize my budget eh? I didn't order anything alcoholic, just coke. Wanted iced water but after asking for it twice, I gave up and asked for a Coke instead which came promptly.

Hello, TGIF. Iced water too cheap so you don't want to serve me with it, is it?

Sizzling Chicken Fajitas. Saran who came late ordered this. In a way, he's always been that nice, caring chap. Never really seen him get pissed or mad. He is nicknamed General Saran due to the way he talks is quite commandeering in a gentle manner. If you are interested, he is still single.

The rest of the fajitas set. That's an awful lot of food , even for me.

That pretty much wraps up the dinner. dee pointed out this advertisement. I think it's for cigarettes which I tried to smoke one courtesy of dee before she grabbed it back saying, "Please don't waste my ciggie" How do I learn to destress by smoking like that? A number of people are surprised at time by the fact that I don't smoke and suggested I do with the amount of stress in my daily (work) life. The stress is still there but learning to deal with it in a less damaging way. Like surfing the Internet. Damaging in other ways but at least the soul is still not as scathed.

My big boss actually wanted the team dinner to be held end of last year but I kinda got it mixed up and waited for him to return just before NY.

what? you mean you haven't organized it yet?

er , no. I was waiting for you to come back.

you could have organized it with your new immediate boss.

him? like , seriously? do you even think he would come?

ok, you've got a point there.

Since the immediate boss wasn't coming, I had to make sure that at least the big boss would. He actually wanted to rush back to KL to drop his car before coming back to PJ. On a Friday -_-

seriously? you want to go back to KL?

yea.

are you sure you're coming back? Or even be able to?!?@!?@

yea, maybe a little late but I'll be back.

I don't want to be the one picking up the bill..

don't worry, I'll make sure it's paid for.

In the end, he didn't go back to KL first which is a good thing since this is how long the bill is. When he wanted to excuse himself to the loo, we looked at him , giving him the don't-even-think-of-running-away evil stare and he returned us with that not-so-assuring look that he wouldn't. Towards the end of the night as the crowd started to disperse, after the other TLs left, it was just down to my ATL before the line of command would trickle to me.

ok, brb. nature call.

oh sure. just leave your BB here.

Not taking any chances ok. Given the amount of drinking, I ain't going to pay it at all. Don't think my credit card would even approve of it.

Heck, even the Govt Tax and service charge alone could pay for my dinner. Like 3 of it. Or 4 if I really want to push it. And it would have been awesome dinners

this could be nothing ...

2012-01-17T00:03:00.000+08:00

When this song first came out, I was still working with teddy. Were we together already then? I think we were. In that initial, happy lovey dovey stage. We were in the engineers room. Told him about that song and he looked it up on Youtube. Found the song and sent it to me.

Or at least that was how my memory kept it to be.
In a way, the song would always remind me of him. The man that I once loved but never asked to decide between her and me. There was no way, I knew, that he would have chosen me. Why was I so sure? She never did anything wrong apart from the usual busy spouse syndrome.

I am happy that they are now in wedded bliss. Not sure if they had a wedding dinner but it wouldn't be surprising if they did and I wasn't invited.

Then comes boo. With boo, it came with a whole different set of problems. In a way, less sticky on my end but more complicated to resolve on his. teddy never quite like boo for the fact that he was more irresponsible than he was years back with me.

The two men that I love in my life.
With the one song that nicely sums it all up.

'Cause you give me something that makes me scared, alright..
This could be nothin', but I'm willing to give it a try..
Please give me something, 'cause someday might know my heart.

I love you both and always will in my strange little way.

great way to kick start Monday

2012-01-16T23:51:00.002+08:00

Told myself yesterday to buy those pre-mixed coffee bags to avoid a no-caffeine Monday morning which would most certainly spell doom. Not to me but those around me. Forgot about it and as I was running late, I kept my fingers crossed that there would be some coffee left in the machine.

Tough luck.
Had to stick with hot lemon tea. Works but not much.

Monday morning being Monday morning, the pace picked up very soon and lemon tea was good.
Fortunately, hermione contributed his packet of caramel popcorn for my morning breakfast.
They went to get some food from TTDI but no coffee for me still :( That was at 8am.

Salvation came at 9am when darshie announced that he was going for lunch and I managed to get him to buy me coffee which came in at 10am. But before that, hermione again pleasantly surprised me with neslo ^_^ It's been such a great day of coffee overload that it felt like I was having a coffee enema through the mouth. No vomiting but certainly saw me visiting the loo more times than I could remember.

Still, all the glorious food on my table They are all saying that I should put some fat on so that I would look better.

am i fat?

well, gotta calculate your BMI and fat percentage.

but based on looks?

you are flabby .

but people who don't exercise tend to be flabby. you hunch when you are naked.

That took me aback. He actually still remembers what I look like naked.
Now, I want to ask him, why would he actually remember something like that?
Do I remember how he looked like naked? Not really.

But the other night as I was watching anime in the dark with my curtains open so that the light from the street would come in, it reminded me painfully of the nights he spent there. Do I really want to be reminded of things like that?

Do you?

which side?

2012-01-16T23:39:00.001+08:00

I was interested to join this but after looking at the prerequisites, I doubt I can afford the USD 250 or the 4hour weekly shift minimum. Ok, perhaps the latter isn't that unattainable. But this clause?

I have no mental impairment or medical disability of which I am aware that would affect my ability to serve objectively and efficiently as an online crisis responder

Probably end up killing more people than I mean to.

i give up

2012-01-16T23:30:00.002+08:00

My camera lens is looking quite dirty and so I decided to give it a good cleaning. Looked in the drawer, can't find it.Digger further in, still no sign of it. Ok, wtf is it? The last I remember, it was that very drawer. Not that there are many to begin with.
There's one for my undergarment.
The other is for my miscellaneous items e.g. my resume, documents.

Decided to just take everything out in search of my lens pen.

About an hour later with an almost sorted drawer but a slightly sweaty body, still no lens pen to be found.
With the sweltering heat, I decided to call it quits and ask cw to loan me his instead

Still, it doesn't answer where mine is ....

it makes me cry

2012-01-16T09:07:00.001+08:00

iPad/iPhone... can't you tell the difference?

thought of the day

2012-01-15T23:38:00.001+08:00

Woman: providing you solutions to problems you never knew you had.
Man: providing you problems you never needed. Or wanted.

End-user: providing you problems you never thought possible.
Tech support: providing you solutions that you never thought possible.

the dress that isn't a lingerie

2012-01-15T23:33:00.001+08:00

At least not by my books.

The dress may have been a little shorter than usual but it has lining.
The lining may have been a little short but it covers my ass, as long as I don't move about too much.
That shouldn't qualify it as lingerie still.

Fixed myself a shojyu with ribena and ice after looking at the shaker margharita picture I uploaded for our team dinner. Oh alcohol, how long has it been? Why didn't I come to you sooner?

That night ended on a pretty high note. Few times during dinner, he asked if we would want to continue the night downtown. Very tempting if not for the fact that it was downtown and there was going to be no way of coming back home.

well, we could go in my car now.

and later?

i surely won't be coming back here

that's the problem.

but you could crash on my couch.

For some reason, I was half expecting that. Anticipating. Hoping. And it came true. Even if not entirely.
But, why didn't I?
Guess I just wasn't high enough =|

This song's been playing in my head for awhile now. Not that I had someone that I got so high that I lost when I came down. If anything, being high was what led me to my momentary happiness called relationship.

What a night for a dance, you know I'm a dancing machine
With a fire in my bones and the sweet taste of kerosene
I get lost in the night so high I don't want to come down
To face the loss of the good thing that I've found

In the dark of the night I could hear you calling my name
With the hardest of hearts I still feel full of pain
So I drink and I smoke and I ask you if you're ever around
Even though it was me who drove us right in the ground

See the time we shared it was precious to me
But all the while I was dreaming of revelry
Born to run, baby run like a stream down a mountainside
With the wind in my back I don't ever even bat an eye
Just know it was you all along who had a hold of my heart
But the demon and me were the best of friends from the start

So the time we shared it was precious to me
All the while I was dreaming of revelry
Dreaming of revelry

And I told myself boy away you go, it rained so hard it felt like snow
Everything came tumbling down on me
In the back of the woods in the dark of the night
Paleness of the old moonlight everything just felt so incomplete

Dreaming of revelry
Dreaming of revelry
Dreaming of revelry
Dreaming of revelry

Review: Tarbush, Food Republic 1U

2012-01-15T22:29:00.001+08:00

Because I like this place enough that I tried enough of their dishes to have one post dedicated to them.

Given that it's one of the pricer stalls, the portions are quite big. I find their garlic sauce display to be pretty cool. Hence the picture. Never tried it before though.

Another thing that I never tried but iMail ordered before one day and I tried some. It tastes a little like yogurt. Not my liking.

Daud Basha -Lamb Meat balls cooked with tomato gravy, served with white rice.
I quite like this but it was a tad bit salty :( Love the crunchy greens and deep fried onion with the fragrant rice.

Chicken Briyani. Better than the other as it wasn't as salty. The rice was quite good with bits of raisins. The curry wasn't that hot spicy.

Lamb briyani. The meat was cooked until just tender and soaking in with the curry.

All in all, the portions are fairly large as each costs about RM13 on average. Value for money especially when you are starving.